“right now my rash is really hurting. literally i am having trouble peeing. how long till yours cleared up?”— Ed Solomon, newyorker.com
“It feels restful. It feels like the kind of place where you can truly be the person you are becoming now, not the person you were in the past.”— Apartment Therapy, apartmenttherapy.com
“Considering you’re the kind of person who took the time out of your work day to write an article about Nancy Pelosi’s coat, you definitely don’t have what it takes to make it out there.”— Carrie Wittmer, thebelladonnacomedy.com
“Getting married at 23 is all fun and games until you realize that you should have waited until your spouse could afford a ring from somewhere other than Claires.”— John Duda, bookofduda.com
“Squirrels, though, are right there with us. They live on our level and toil on the same schedule as humans, in every season.”— Avi Steinberg, nytimes.com
“Christopher Robin: I've cracked. Winnie The Pooh: Oh, I don't see any cracks. A few wrinkles, maybe.”— Tom McCarthy, Alex Ross Perry, Allison Schroeder, Greg Brooker, Mark Steven Johnson, Winnie the Pooh, Jim Cummings, imdb.com
“People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.”— Tom McCarthy, Alex Ross Perry, Allison Schroeder, Mark Steven Johnson, Greg Brooker, Winnie the Pooh, Jim Cummings, imdb.com
“Riley insists she’s exemplifying how women can have unconventional yet fulfilling careers.”— Drew Anderson, reductress.com
“The sky turning an eerie fluorescent blue is cause for plenty of alarm, whether or not you’re high, and plenty of New Yorkers reportedly began packing go bags. Others, however, decided that they just had to get a few tweets off before the blue light consumed bodies and the world descended into darkn…”— Ella Cerón, thecut.com
“Summer solstice came and went, and though I was still jobless, our lights’ glow distracted me from anxiously reviewing all the irrational reasons I’d never be able to join the American workforce again.”— Jennifer Epperson, manrepeller.com
“Dude was born in a stack of hay and toiled as a carpenter, building himself up from nothing to become someone we still talk about today (not to mention, the star of the best-selling book of all-time).”— Erin Taj, melmagazine.com
“I already share the earth with so many living things: for instance, my boyfriend who got some shampoo in his eyes yesterday that I had to help him clean out. That was very scary for him.”— Miranda Kronfeld, reductress.com
“Don’t Meet Him Halfway or Go Dutch on a Date versus Pay More Than Your Fair Share and Say, “I’m a Sagittarius, the Most Generous Sign in the Zodiac””— Blythe Roberson, newyorker.com
“You see, contrary to popular belief, Black Patience takes time and effort to prepare. Culling Black Patience from the depths of the Black Psyche takes a lot of work and… we’re losing you, aren’t we?”— Jenna Lyles, mcsweeneys.net
“Boy, you must have a knife, because you just cut straight through to my heart. Oh no, you do have a knife? I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.”— Mary Cella, newyorker.com
“Some may tell you to pursue views, clicks or followers, but I’m here to tell you there’s no more noble pursuit than that of authenticity. If you want to fight against all the bullshit online, it’s paramount that you understand the importance of being honest, being you, and most crucially, being true…”— Haley Nahman, manrepeller.com
“Part of the reason I don’t want to do this is because I can always find a better use for any given 20-minute period than “doing nothing.” TV, for instance. Having a snack. Sex, if anyone my age ever had sex, even once.”— Katie Heaney, thecut.com