“‘Phoebe, do you want to help out?’ Phoebe: ‘Oh I wish I could but I don’t want to.’”— Phoebe Buffay, amazon.com
“Reporter: 'I like that. What’s your name?' Phoebe: 'Phoebe. That’s, P, as in Phoebe, H, as in hoebe, O as in oebe, E, as in ebe, B, as in bebe, and E as in… ‘Ello there mate.'”— Phoebe Buffay, amazon.com
“Oh my God. I've become my father. I've been trying so hard not to become my mother, I didn't see this coming.”— Rachel Green, amazon.com
“Your tombstone can say whatever you want it to say. It could say, 'Ross Geller, Good at Marriage!' Y'know? Mine's gonna say, 'Phoebe Buffay, Buried Alive.'”— Phoebe Buffay, amazon.com
“Chandler still thinks I'm pregnant and he hasn't asked me how I'm feeling or offered to carry my bags. I feel bad for the woman who ends up with him.”— Phoebe Buffay, amazon.com
“If you want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer.”— Phoebe Buffay, amazon.com
“But they don't know that we know they know we know!”— Alexa Junge, Phoebe Buffay, Lisa Kudrow, imdb.com
“She's your lobster. C'mon you guys. It's a known fact that lobsters fall in love and mate for life. You can actually see old lobster couples, walking around their tank, you know, holding claws. ... See? He's her lobster!”— Phoebe Buffay, amazon.com
“Just so you know, it's not that common, it doesn't happen to every guy, and it is a big deal!”— Rachel Green, amazon.com
“Rachel: 'Hey, Mon, look, I’m melting butter.' Monica: 'That’s great, Rach. You now have the cooking skills of a hot day.'”— Rachel Green, Monica Geller, amazon.com
“You could not be any more wrong. You could try, but you would not be successful.”— Ross Geller, amazon.com
“Ross: 'Wow, you guys sure have a lot of books about being a lesbian.' Susan: 'Well, you know, you have to take a course. Otherwise they don’t let you do it.'”— Ross Geller, Susan Bunch, amazon.com
“How long do cats live? Like assuming you don’t throw ‘em under a bus or something?”— Rachel Green, amazon.com