“Sandy: And you're going to yogalates. Kirsten: You just like saying that. Sandy: Yogalates? Yeah, I kinda do. Yogalates? Ryan: Yogalates.”— Allan Heinberg, Josh Schwartz, Sandy Cohen, Peter Gallagher, imdb.com
“Seth: Ryan, that's extremely minty of you. I didn't even know they had musicals in Chino. I didn't even know they had dancing, or... laughter. Ryan: That's because no one who lived there is as funny as you. Seth: So, we finally agree I'm the funny one. Well, look at that! Looks like we all learned s…”— Brian Oh, Josh Schwartz, Seth Cohen, Adam Brody, imdb.com
“Seth: What? It’s Anna. I could have said "pop a squat" in front of her if I wanted to. Ryan: Sometimes I think you talk just to make sounds. Seth: Sometimes I do.”— Allan Heinberg, Seth Cohen, Adam Brody, imdb.com
“Seth: So when you lost your virginity, I was playing 'Magic: the Gathering.' Ryan: You still play Magic. Seth: Yeah, but not as much.”— Allan Heinberg, Seth Cohen, Adam Brody, imdb.com
“Sailing is, like, so not the fastest way to get anywhere.”— Erica Messer, Debra J. Fisher, Summer Roberts, Rachel Bilson, imdb.com
“Anna: Oh, so insulting him counts as conversation? Seth: Oh, well. If it doesn't, we've never spoken.”— Erica Messer, Debra J. Fisher, Seth Cohen, Adam Brody, imdb.com
“Sandy: If you can't tell your dad, who can you tell? Seth: Gee, I don't know. Ryan, Mom, that tree over there. Sandy: You're gonna miss me when I'm gone. Seth: When are you leaving?”— Melissa Rosenberg, Allan Heinberg, Seth Cohen, Adam Brody, imdb.com
“Seth: We gotta get your photo taken for your school ID. Ryan: Another mugshot? Seth: If you must be so cynical.”— Melissa Rosenberg, Allan Heinberg, Ryan Atwood, Ben McKenzie, imdb.com
“Seth: I'm going 70 in a 65 zone. Summer: 80 is the new 70. Seth: What? Who talks like that? Summer: Who gets passed by a van full of nuns? Oh, wait, Cohen does! Seth: Well they have God on their side, Summer, okay. I'm not gonna beat Jesus. Summer: I'm gonna call Holly and see how far ahead of us th…”— Josh Schwartz, Summer Roberts, Rachel Bilson, imdb.com
“Seth: Comicon is basically a bunch of pathetic virgins ogling some porn star dressed as Catwoman. Ryan: I thought you said you went every year.”— Josh Schwartz, Ryan Atwood, Ben McKenzie, imdb.com
“Seth: What happens in Mexico stays in Mexico. Ryan: What happens in Mexico? Seth: I don't know, because it stays there. That's why we must go!”— Josh Schwartz, Seth Cohen, Adam Brody, imdb.com
“Gabrielle: Fifth grade? Okay, she needs to change that. She's known that guy since he's been eating paste. Seth: I think he still does.”— Erica Messer, Debra J. Fisher, Josh Schwartz, Seth Cohen, Adam Brody, imdb.com
“Seth: Is it twisted if I find my potential grandma really hot? Ryan: Not when she looks like that.”— Erica Messer, Debra J. Fisher, Josh Schwartz, Seth Cohen, Adam Brody, imdb.com
“Caleb: Seth! Ah... You're still not a football player. Seth: Ha, no, but thank you.”— Erica Messer, Debra J. Fisher, Josh Schwartz, Seth Cohen, Adam Brody, imdb.com
“It turns out that I'm quite skilled at getting a date, provided it's not for me.”— Melissa Rosenberg, Seth Cohen, Adam Brody, imdb.com
“Ryan: It's kind of a shady neighborhood. It's pretty hardcore up there. Seth: Dude, it's Long Beach, not Chechnya.”— Melissa Rosenberg, Seth Cohen, Adam Brody, imdb.com
“Dude, you're a Cohen now. Welcome to a life of insecurity and paralyzing self-doubt.”— Allan Heinberg, Josh Schwartz, Seth Cohen, Adam Brody, imdb.com
“Ryan: I used to want to be an architect. Kirsten: And what do you want to be now? Ryan: Seventeen. Kirsten: Me, too.”— Jane Espenson, Kirsten Cohen, Kelly Rowan, imdb.com
“Sandy: Wow! You're all set up for your Newpsie convention! Hey, when do these vultures land? Kirsten: Soon, and I'm sure that I have a doily out of place somewhere. Sandy: Good. Gives them something to talk about.”— Jane Espenson, Sandy Cohen, Peter Gallagher, imdb.com
“Sandy: The minute you were born, I knew that I would never take another easy breath again without knowing that you were safe. Seth: So, I'm like asthma?”— Allan Heinberg, Josh Schwartz, Sandy Cohen, Peter Gallagher, imdb.com