Hilary Jacobs Hendel

8 quotes

Psychotherapist · Female

Hilary Jacobs Hendel is a psychotherapist, author (Random House, 2017), blogger, and consultant. She received her BA in Biochemistry from Wesleyan University and an MSW from Fordham University. She is a certified psychoanalyst and certified AEDP psychotherapist and supervisor. She has published articles in professional journals including the “Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy” and “The AEDP Journal: Transformance.” Her widely read New York Times Opinion article entitled “It’s Not Always Depression, Sometimes It’s Shame” published March 10, 2015 was the #1 emailed article for 36 hours and #2 New York Times article read that day. Hilary’s blog, “The Change Triangle” can be read at http://Hilaryjacobshendel.com|Hilaryjacobshendel.com. Hilary was the Mental Health Consultant for the Emmy Award winning television show, Mad Men on AMC. She lives in New York City.

All Imagination (1)Importance of Touch (1)Understanding Your Feelings (1)Creating New Realities (1)Parenting (1)Dating (1)emotions (1)Hugging Is The Answer (1)Who You Are (1)Find Your True Self (1)Childhood (1)Overcoming Trauma (1)Adulthood (1)Riffs In Relationships (1)Child Abuse (1)

From “ Start Fantasizing!”

“Amazing scientific fact: The brain cannot tell the difference between fantasy and reality. For example, when I imagine I am running, evidence shows my brain reacting in large part as if I am actually running. This helps explain why using imagination and fantasy is a powerful tool for feeling better.”

Tagged: Imagination, Fake It Until You Make It, Creating New Realities

From “ The Feeling of Not Enough”

“We are not born feeling inadequate. Life experiences and emotions create that sense within us in a variety of creative ways. For example, when we were little and we felt afraid or anxious, our mind told us something was wrong with us, not with our environment. That's why children who were abused or…”

Tagged: Childhood, Psychology, Child Abuse, Adulthood

“In the long run, we heal the parts of us that feel inadequate by first becoming aware of them. Once aware, we listen to them and try to fully understand the story of how they came to believe they were not enough. Over time, by naming, validating and processing the associated emotions both from the…”

Tagged: Healing, Overcoming Trauma

From “The Healing Power of Hugs”

“The answer is touch. Hugs and other forms of nonsexual physical soothing, like hand-holding and head stroking, intervene at the physical level to help the brain and the body calm down from overwhelming states of anxiety, panic and shame.”

Tagged: How To Feel Better!, Hugging Is The Answer, Importance of Touch

From “When Being a “Bad Guy” Leads To Good”

“Sometimes the best approach for a parent is to give children choices.”

Tagged: Parenting

From “ It's Not Always Depression, Sometimes It's Shame”

“... There are basically two categories of emotions. There are core emotions, like anger, joy and sadness, which when experienced viscerally lead to a sense of relief and clarity (even if they are initially unpleasant). And there are inhibitory emotions, like shame, guilt and anxiety, which serve to…”

Tagged: emotions, Understanding Your Feelings

From “Hilary Jacobs Hendel Author, Psychotherapist, The Change Triangle”

“Why do we lose touch with our core Selves? As children, we all have the job of adapting to our families, our peers, our communities and our culture. We sacrifice self-expression to stay in the good graces of those we need. This is essential for survival. But when we deny, thwart, or exclude too much…”

Tagged: Who You Are, Find Your True Self

From “5 Qualities To Look For In A Life Partner”

“When relationships are strained, humor can diffuse a struggle and transform a moment from bad to better.”

Tagged: Dating, How To Stop A Fight, Riffs In Relationships

Hilary Jacobs Hendel

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