If your husband is cheating on you, it doesn't mean that you need to get prettier -- it means he's a scumbag.
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Jessica Valenti
Jessica Valenti (born November 1, 1978) is an American blogger and feminist writer, founder of the Feministing blog in 2004. She is the author or co-author of six books on women's issues: Full Frontal Feminism (2007), Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual Power and A World Without Rape (2008) with Jaclyn Friedman, He's a Stud, She's a Slut (2008), The Purity Myth (2009), Why Have Kids (2012), and Sex Object: A Memoir (2016). Her work has appeared in Ms., The Nation, The Washington Post, TPMCafe, Alternet and The Guardian. In 2011, The Guardian, where Valenti works as a daily columnist, named her as one of their "top 100 women" for her work to bring the feminist movement online. 2Background Valenti was raised in Long Island City, Queens in an Italian American family. Her father was a Buddhist. Valenti graduated from Stuyvesant High School. She received her master's degree in Women's and Gender Studies from Rutgers University. On October 3, 2009, she married Andrew Golis, the deputy publisher of Talking Points Memo. 2Writing and blogging Valenti founded Feministing in 2004, while she was working at the National Organization for Women's legal defense fund (now Legal Momentum), Homa Khaleeli writes in The Guardian's top 100 women that the site shifted the feminist movement online, triggering the creation of blogs and discussion groups, creating a heyday for feminism just as its death was being announced, as Khaleeli puts i
What’s the worst possible thing you can call a woman? Don’t hold back, now.You’re probably thinking of words like slut, whore, bitch, cunt (I told you not to hold back!), skank.Okay, now, what are the worst things you can call a guy? Fag, girl, bitch, pussy. I’ve even heard the term “mangina.”Notice…
Value yourself for what the media doesn't. Your intelligence, your street smarts, your ability to play a kick-ass game of pool, whatever. So long as it's not just valuing yourself for your ability to look hot in a bikini and be available to men, it's an improvement.
While falling in love is fun, it’s not everything, and it’s not the antidote to an unfulfilled life.
No one wants to listen to our sad stories unless they are smoothed over with a joke or nice melody. And even then, not always. No one wants to hear a woman talking or writing about pain in a way that suggests that it doesn't end.
Ignoring men, whether romantically or rhetorically, is existential violence to them
I am tied of faking confidence or being told that my lack thereof is a fault when it seems to me the most natural reaction I could possibly have to the lifelong feedback women are given. I don't want to be confident or inspirational and I don't want to buck up anymore because the faking takes more…
My father took me aside one day soon after and told me this: The things you do in your twenties are just things you do. But as you approach thirty what you do starts to become who you are. And there are some things you do not want to be forever.
Edgar Allen Poe once called the death of a beautiful woman 'the most poetical topic in the world' and I've often found myself wondering how many woman writers who have killed themselves or let themselves be otherwise obliterated were trying, somehow, to fulfill this most popular of narratives.