“Gabe Lewis: Michael, you've just physically assaulted an employee. Can we talk in private? Michael Scott: Yes. Of course. What's this in reference to?”Tagged: Assault, Work, Employees, punishment, humor
“Andy Bernard: That kid is the worst. Needs to be fired, Michael. Michael Scott: He's not the worst. Okay? He's not the worst. You know who's the worst? That intern we had a few years ago. That guy. Remember? That face, how ugly he was? He was the worst. Good worker, though.”Tagged: Fired, Office, office work, ugly, humor
“Hi Holly, it's Michael. I just wanted to call and let you know that I was thinking about what you said, it's just... you know? It's weird, today I ended up seeing a lot of the women that I used to date, and in my mind they were all great, and then when I actually saw them it was mostly a freak show.…”Tagged: Phone Call, message, humor, Sad, Break Up
“If you break that girl's heart, I will kill you. That's just a figure of speech. But seriously, if you break that girl's heart, I will literally kill you and your entire family.”Tagged: Threat, Murder, Kill, Heartbreak, Warning
“The world sends people your way. Ryan came to me through a temp agency. Andy was transferred here. No idea where Creed came from. The point is, you just have to play with the cards that you're dealt. Jim, that guy is an Ace. Dwight is my King up my sleeve. Phyllis is my Old Maid. Oscar is my Queen.…”Tagged: cards, Business, Wild Card, Joker, Analogy