“Can someone please get my towel? It’s in my room next to my Irish walking cape!”Tagged: towel, Irish walking cape
“Damp towel, damp! It’s like a really big wet nap. I feel like I’m being licked by a golden retriever. Look at this bathroom. There should not be two girls in this bathroom. You’re too humid.”Tagged: damp towel, Nap, Simile Examples, Golden Retriever, Bathroom Bucket
“Hey everyone I'm Julius Pepperwood, ex-cop, ex-marine...I'm from Chicago. Thin crust pizza? No thank you, I'm from Chicago.”Tagged: Pizza Jokes, Chicago Impersonations
“Look at that font! What is this? Amateur hour? At least use Palatino.”Tagged: Jokes for Writers, Name that Font
“Hollywood is teaching people that the way you react when you see a transgender person's body is to vomit.”Tagged: Hollywood, Media, Vomit