“Dick Kelly: The greatest gift a grandson can give his grandfather is a hot college girl who wants to have unprotected sex with her before he dies.
Jason Kelly: You know, most grandpas just want toffee or socks.”
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“Lenore: I like your pull-out couch. Dick Kelly: Yeah? Well I got news for you, that’s the…”
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“No. Hey, you know one in three of these girls have herpes. Even if you can’t see it.”
“Dick Kelly: I haven’t had sex in fifteen years, and I want fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,…”