“Lenore: I like your pull-out couch. Dick Kelly: Yeah? Well I got news for you, that’s the only thing that’s gonna be pulling out tonight.”Tagged: Pull-Out Couch, rhythm method, Double Entendres
“Dick Kelly: The greatest gift a grandson can give his grandfather is a hot college girl who wants to have unprotected sex with her before he dies. Jason Kelly: You know, most grandpas just want toffee or socks.”Tagged: Unprotected Sex, Hookers, Hot College Girls, Toffee, Socks
“I want you to tear open my bra like it’s a Social Security check. Now fumble around and pretend like you’re trying to find your glasses.”Tagged: Come-ons, bra, Social Security Check, Elderly Sex
“No. Hey, you know one in three of these girls have herpes. Even if you can’t see it.”Tagged: Herpes, Invisible Herpes
“Dick Kelly: I haven’t had sex in fifteen years, and I want fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! Jason Kelly: I’m gonna throw up.”Tagged: Sex, Abstinence, Horny, Vomit