“Wichita: [playing Monopoly] Ooh! Free parking...
Little Rock: Yeah.
Wichita: —which coincidentally is the best thing about Zombieland.
Columbus: You want to know the best thing about Z-land? No—no Facebook status updates. You know, Rob Curtis is gearing up for Friday. Who cares?
Tallahassee: The best thing is no more flushing. Epic.”
More from Rhett Reese
“It’s amazing how quickly things can go from bad to total shit storm.”
“[after his neighbor changes into a zombie] You see? You just can’t trust anyone. The first…”
“The first rule of Zombieland: cardio. When the zombie outbreak first hit, the first to go,…”
“You are like a giant cock-blocking robot, like, developed in a secret fucking government…”