“Elliot: Dr. Cox, does this shade of red make me look like a clown?
Dr. Cox: No... Barbie, no. It makes you look like a prostitute that caters exclusively to clowns.”
More from Tim Hobert
“Well, when you say 'classmate', it sounds like we take naps together and eat paste, but…”
“I have a conflict. It conflicts with the enjoyment of my life.”
“Look at me. I've got the body of a fifth grader.”
“I was so unpopular in high school, the crossing guards used to lure me into traffic!”