“Our first assignment is a documentary. They're like real movies but with ugly people.”Tagged: Documentary, assignment, real movies, ugly
“Well, when you say 'classmate', it sounds like we take naps together and eat paste, but what's great about community college is that a lot of the students are just as mature as the teachers.”Tagged: classmate, Naps, Paste, community college, Students
“I was so unpopular in high school, the crossing guards used to lure me into traffic!”Tagged: Unpopular, high school, crossing guard
“Elliot: Dr. Cox, does this shade of red make me look like a clown? Dr. Cox: No... Barbie, no. It makes you look like a prostitute that caters exclusively to clowns.”Tagged: Clowns, Prostitute, Sassy, Red Lipstick
“Dude, the only difference between a black girl and a white girl is that when a black girl asks you if her ass looks big, you say, 'Hell yeah!'”Tagged: Black Girl, White Girl, ass, Big Butt
“Dr. Kelso: This Friday, I am receiving an award from the A.M.A.— Dr. Cox: Jerk-Off of the Year. No, Bastard of the Year! Uh, don't you tell me! Guy I Despise So Much, I'd Pay Someone To Kill You and Stuff You and Leave You by my Bed, So That When I Wake Up in the Morning, I Could Roll Over and Punch…”Tagged: Awards, Bastard, insults, Sassy, Hatred
“Patient: I was so obsessed with getting my J.D. that I never did the things I really wanted to do. Start a family. See the world. Janitor: Punch a whale. Patient: Nah, I punched a whale. Right in the face. Down he went, like Liston.”Tagged: Bucketlist, Family, Regrets, travel, Whale