“There was a prison break and I saw a midget climb up the fence. As he jumped down he sneered at me and I thought, well that's a little condescending.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“The midget fortune teller who kills his customers is a small medium at large.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.”— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com
“Hey! I was going to tell you a belt joke but... I didn't want to waist your time.”— burnedupwaffle, reddit.com
“I've spent three sleepless nights trying to think of a mountain pun. I'm starting to think I wont Everest.”— TommehBoi, reddit.com
“While most puns make me feel numb, Math puns always makes me feel number.”— Yomamasonice, reddit.com
“Did you hear about the chef that died? He pasta way. We cannoli do so much. His legacy will become a pizza history. He ran out of thyme He lentil us some of his best secrets.”— pm-me-big-boobies, reddit.com
“A couple is walking in St. Petersburg Square on Christmas Eve. They feel a slight precipitation. I think it's raining," says the man. "No, it's snowing," says the woman. "How about we ask the Communist officer here? He is always right!" exclaims the man. "Officer Rudolph, is it raining or showing?"…”— KirbyDogs, reddit.com
“A bear walks into a bar. He says to the bartender, "I'll have a............beer." The bartender responds, "what's with the big pause? The bear holds up his arms and says, "always had 'em.”— EmeraldStickyNote, reddit.com