Quotes tagged ‘Reproduction’

“A chicken is an egg’s way of making another egg.”

— Bob DeLaurentis, V.M. Vargas, David Thewlis, imdb.com

“Winifred Sanderson: Well, tell me friend, what is this contraption? Bus Driver: I call it a bus. Winifred Sanderson: A bus. And its purpose? Bus Driver: To convey gorgeous creatures such as yourselves to your most...[cracks his knuckle] Forbidden desires. Winifred Sanderson: [laughs] Well, fancy! We…”

— Mick Garris, Neil Cuthbert, David Kirschner, Bus Driver, Don Yesso, imdb.com

“Paulie Walnuts: Amazing thing about snakes is that they reproduce spontaneously. Tony Soprano: What do you mean? Paulie Walnuts: They have both male and female sex organs. That’s why somebody you don’t trust you call a snake. How can you trust a guy who can literally go fuck themselves? Tony Soprano…”

— Michael Imperioli, Paulie Walnuts, Tony Sirico, imdb.com

“Love is the lie we tell ourselves so we don't go extinct.”

— Jenji Kohan, Jim Danger Gray, Sam Healy, Michael Harney, imdb.com

“You see a little troll tobogganing out of your wife's snatch on a wave of turds and part of you will hold her responsible.”

— Sharon Horgan, Chris, Mark Bonnar, imdb.com

“Cartman: Mom, can I ask you a question? Mrs. Cartman: Sure, Hun. Cartman: You know how my friend Stan has, like, a dad? Mrs. Cartman: Uh-huh. Cartman: And my friend Kyle has a dad and my friend Kenny has a dad? Mrs. Cartman: Yes? [long pause] Mrs. Cartman: Well, what's your question, Hun? Cartman: G…”

— David A. Goodman, Eric Cartman, Trey Parker, imdb.com

“Chef: Now children, gather around, and watch the wonders of life. The beauty of Mother Nature. [The pig is heard squealing loudly] Stan: Ah, sick! Cartman: Fluffy! Chef: Hmm, now I know how all those white women must have felt.”

— Dan Sterling, Matt Stone, Trey Parker, Chef, Isaac Hayes, imdb.com

“Louise: Where do babies come from? Linda: You all came from my vagina.”

— Steven Davis, Kelvin Yu, Linda Belcher, John Roberts, imdb.com

“Why does it take a million sperm to fertilize one egg? They really are too damn proud to stop and ask for directions.”

— Unknown, tcat.tc

“Let me understand, you got the hen, the chicken and the rooster. The rooster goes with the chicken. So who's having sex with the hen?”

— Carol Leifer, Frank Costanza, Jerry Stiller, imdb.com

“Between the heroin epidemic, the instant gratification culture of the Internet, and this, a Brave New World seems plausible now.”

— Joshua Grubbs, twitter.com