“Every Halloween, I bring a spare costume, in case I strike out with the hottest girl at the party. That way, I have a second chance to make a first impression.”Tagged: Halloween, spare costume, strike out, hot girl, Second Chance
“The only reason to wait a month for sex is if she's 17 years, 11 months old.”Tagged: Wait, Sex, month, young, illegal
“Ted, how many times have I told you to put the lid back on the peanut butter jar?! It's this inconsiderate, immature jackassery that makes me feel like I'm living in The Real World house! And not the early days when they all had jobs and social consciences, I'm talking about Hawaii, and after! I…”Tagged: Peanut Butter, inconsiderate, real world, Hawaii