Episode

Happiness

by Donick Cary, Jack Griffin, Glenn Howerton, Trent O'Donnell, Stef Duncan and 5 others

With no archrival to combat, Jack sets his sights on a new mission: write the most brilliant philosophy book ever and get out of Toledo for good. Stef and Mary forget a special day for Michele. Helen forgets to order routine maintenance for the copier cau

(10 total)

Characters

Donick Cary (10)Glenn Howerton (7)Jack Griffin (7)Stef Duncan (1)Victor Kozlowski (1)Jacob Houston (1)Helen Henry DeMarcus (1)Paula Pell (1)Lyric Lewis (1)

“I'd smooch Durbin if I wasn't as gay as a tree full of birds.”

— Donick Cary, Helen Henry DeMarcus, Paula Pell, imdb.com

Tagged: kiss, Simile Examples

“Keep your eyes peeled for more beer o'clocks.”

— Donick Cary, Jack Griffin, Glenn Howerton, imdb.com

Tagged: Eyes Peeled , Beer, Drinking Time

“Good night, sweet prince.”

— Donick Cary, Victor Kozlowski, Jacob Houston, imdb.com

Tagged: Night, sweet, gentle, Prince

“Okay, so there's four basic categories of happiness that I'm going to want to focus on all right? One, work a job where you can see the physical results of your labor at the end of each day. Two, make up mundane celebrations to distract you from your inevitable death. Number three, ingest sugary, fa…”

— Donick Cary, Jack Griffin, Glenn Howerton, imdb.com

Tagged: Happiness, Work, Job, Life

“Oh Michelle, you white ass Rihanna, of course, the 20th!”

— Donick Cary, Stef Duncan, Lyric Lewis, imdb.com

Tagged: Rihanna, Excited

“Yeah, I'm seeing a lot of rollie pollies under here. Are they gonna be okay?”

— Donick Cary, Jack Griffin, Glenn Howerton, imdb.com

Tagged: bugs, Concerned

“You know what I'm going to do? Buy one of those Japanese talking toilets. See what that has to say.”

— Donick Cary, Jack Griffin, Glenn Howerton, imdb.com

Tagged: Toilets, talking, Tachnology

“So I'm not gonna teach you anything in here, okay? If you keep your mouth shut, you get an A. If you say anything to anybody, you get an F. Welcome to AP Bio.”

— Donick Cary, Jack Griffin, Glenn Howerton, imdb.com

Tagged: Teach, grades, Biology

“They work hard all day long and then they reward themselves with simple things.”

— Donick Cary, Jack Griffin, Glenn Howerton, imdb.com

Tagged: Work Hard, Life, Simple Things, treat

“At one point, I saw a girl, a child really, eat an entire spoonful of just mayo.”

— Donick Cary, Jack Griffin, Glenn Howerton, imdb.com

Tagged: Gross, Mayo, Eat, food