“Kids; can't live with them, can't shoot them.”
— Robin Swicord, Akiva Goldsman, Adam Brooks, Mark Steven Johnson, Grandpa Gustafson, Burgess Meredith, imdb.com
Tagged: kids
Movie
Grumpy Old Men
by Robin Swicord, Akiva Goldsman, Adam Brooks, Mark Steven Johnson, Max Goldman and 34 others
For decades, next-door neighbors and former friends John and Max have feuded, trading insults and wicked pranks. When an attractive widow moves in nearby, their bad blood erupts into a high-stakes rivalry full of naughty jokes and adolescent hijinks. Will
(19 total)
Characters
“Ariel Truax: John, when was the last time you made love? John Gustafson: October 4th...1978. Ariel Truax: Oh, I think we're safe.”
— Robin Swicord, Akiva Goldsman, Adam Brooks, Mark Steven Johnson, John Gustafson, Jack Lemmon, imdb.com
Tagged: incel
“Looks like Chuck's taking old one-eye to the optometrist.”
— Robin Swicord, Akiva Goldsman, Adam Brooks, Mark Steven Johnson, Grandpa Gustafson, Burgess Meredith, imdb.com
Tagged: sexual euphemisms
“We did the horizontal mambo.”
— Robin Swicord, Akiva Goldsman, Adam Brooks, Mark Steven Johnson, John Gustafson, Jack Lemmon, imdb.com
Tagged: sexual euphemisms
“Ariel Truax: [John is showing Ariel some family pictures] And these two little guys? John Gustafson: Oh! That's me and the moron. Ariel Truax: Is that Max? John Gustafson: Of course it's Max. He's ugly, isn't he? Ariel Truax: Aw, you mean you were friends? John Gustafson: I was 10, and didn't know a…”
— Robin Swicord, Akiva Goldsman, Adam Brooks, Mark Steven Johnson, John Gustafson, Jack Lemmon, imdb.com
“Hey, watch your mouth you dumb friggin' Swede.”
— Robin Swicord, Akiva Goldsman, Adam Brooks, Mark Steven Johnson, Max Goldman, Walter Matthau, imdb.com
Tagged: Swedophobia
“Max Goldman: [Knows that John is hiding and listening, but can't give himself away] You mean the lowlife, asswipe, egg-sucker John Gustafson? Snyder: Have you seen him? Max Goldman: The man's crazy. Loco. Always hanging out around those kinky strip bars. You know, the ones where the men take their c…”
— Robin Swicord, Akiva Goldsman, Adam Brooks, Mark Steven Johnson, Max Goldman, Walter Matthau, imdb.com
“If I had known I would be doing a nude scene, I'd have asked for another million.”
— Robin Swicord, Akiva Goldsman, Adam Brooks, Mark Steven Johnson, Max Goldman, Walter Matthau, imdb.com
Tagged: Nude Scene
“Max Goldman: You're trying to steal her away like you did Mae. John Gustafson: Oh, well, I'll remind you, Einstein, that Mae was no prize. Max Goldman: She was to me. John Gustafson: I was married to the woman for 20 years, she was no prize! Max Goldman: She was to me. John Gustafson: Well, that's w…”
— Robin Swicord, Akiva Goldsman, Adam Brooks, Mark Steven Johnson, Max Goldman, Walter Matthau, imdb.com
“Max Goldman: You know what Jacob said? Jacob said old Billy Hensel was killed in a car crash. Cleared his car straight off the bridge into the Mississippi. John Gustafson: Lucky bastard. Max Goldman: You bet. John Gustafson: Hey, how is he, anyway? Max Goldman: Dead! Died on impact! John Gustafson:…”
— Robin Swicord, Akiva Goldsman, Adam Brooks, Mark Steven Johnson, Max Goldman, Walter Matthau, imdb.com
“Do me a favor. Put your lip over your head... and swallow.”
— Robin Swicord, Akiva Goldsman, Adam Brooks, Mark Steven Johnson, Max Goldman, Walter Matthau, imdb.com
Tagged: insults