Episode

The Apartment

by Peter Mehlman, Jerry Seinfeld, Tom Cherones, Glenn Shadix, Tony Plana and 5 others

Kramer tries mousse in his hair. Jerry gets Elaine an opportunity to get the apartment right above him, before he realizes the possible implications. George tests the "man with a wedding band" theory of meeting women.

(6 total)

Characters

Jerry Seinfeld (6)Peter Mehlman (6)Jason Alexander (3)George Costanza (3)

“There's always that certain group of people, isn't it? They're talking and talking, and everyone around them is shushing them and shushing them. They won't shush. They're the unshushables.”

— Peter Mehlman, Jerry Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld, imdb.com

Tagged: Loud People, inconsiderate

“I just threw away a lifetime of guilt-free sex and floor seats for every sporting event in Madison Square Garden. So please, a little respect. For I am Costanza, Lord of the Idiots!”

— Peter Mehlman, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: Guilt, Sex, idiocy, Madison Square Garden, Respect

“People don't turn down money! It's what separates us from the animals.”

— Peter Mehlman, Jerry Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld, imdb.com

Tagged: Greed, Money, humanity

“You may think you're an idiot, but with all due respect—I’m a much bigger idiot than you are.”

— Peter Mehlman, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: idiocy, Competition

“You know the way I am—rarely ever thinking of myself. My only concern is the welfare and happiness of those close to me. Sure, it hurts sometimes—to give, and give, and give.”

— Peter Mehlman, Jerry Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld, imdb.com

Tagged: selfishness, Generosity, Happiness

“I lie every second of the day. My whole life is a sham!”

— Peter Mehlman, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: lying