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Quotes tagged ‘Baldness’

(10 total)

I only have hair around the sides of my head, but I do let it down.

I will be home in another ten days and will reveal many things that will make your hair stand on end—assuming that you still have any.

— Groucho Marx, amazon.com

Are you saying that I could be dating this hair? With you under it?

— Jennifer Crittenden, Elaine Benes, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, imdb.com

I tell you, when she threw that toupee out the window, it was the best thing that ever happened to me. I feel like my old self again. Totally inadequate, completely insecure, paranoid, neurotic, it's a pleasure.

— Carol Leifer, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

I got rejected by a bald woman. A bald woman rejected me. Heh, you like that one? A woman with no prospects and no hair told me that I wasn't her type. Apparently, Baldie likes a slimmer guy.

— Carol Leifer, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Well, you really got bald there, didn't you?

— Sam Kass, Larry David, Tom Gammill, Max Pross, Tom Gammill and Max Pross, Jerry Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld, imdb.com

Hey believe me, baldness will catch on. When the aliens come, who do you think they're gonna relate to? Who do you think is going to be the first ones getting a tour of the ship?

— Larry David, Jerry Seinfeld, Tom Gammill, Max Pross, Tom Gammill and Max Pross, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Maybe you don't have to be so funny. I mean, would it kill you not to be so funny all the time? That's all I'm asking. This woman thinks I'm very funny. Now you're gonna be funny, so what am I gonna be? I'm gonna be a short bald guy with glasses who suddenly doesn't seem so funny.

— Peter Mehlman, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

The technical term for a nose job is rhinoplasty. Rhino, okay? Do we really need to insult the person at this particular moment of their lives? They know they have a big nose, that's why they're coming in. Do they really need the abuse of being compared to a rhinoceros on top of everything else? Whe…

— Peter Mehlman, Jerry Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld, imdb.com

No baldness; it'd be like a nation of Supermen.

— Don McEnery, Larry David, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

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