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Quotes tagged ‘Bear’

(15 total)

Sometimes you eat the bear, and sometimes, well, he eats you.

— Ethan Coen, Joel Coen, The Stranger, Sam Elliott, imdb.com

Bear...bear-fucker, do you need assistance?

— Jay Chandrasekhar, Kevin Heffernan, Paul Soter, Steve Lemme, Erik Stolhanske, imdb.com

Ask the man inside of you this: When you come face to face with destiny, do you want to be the bear or do you want to be the one holding the shotgun?

— Howard Korder, Commodore Louis Kaestner, Dabney Coleman, imdb.com

Zorya: You keep giving away your life. You don't much care if you live or die do you? Shadow: The world's not what I thought it would be. Zorya: You'd rather die than live in a world with bears in the sky.

— Maria Melnik, Shadow Moon, Ricky Whittle, imdb.com

I'm Bogey the Bear, I'm covered with hair!

— Patrick Hasburgh, 'Howling Mad' Murdock, Dwight Schultz, imdb.com

I'd rather shower with a bear.

— Steve Franks, Carlton Lassiter, Timothy Omundson, imdb.com

I watched a bear once. His leg was in a steel trap. It chewed through bloody bone to get free. It was in Alaska. Died about an hour later facedown in a stream. But it was on his own terms, you know? You got close. Closer than anybody else. I don't know if it was you or your partner, but look. If you…

— Noah Hawley, imdb.com

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.

— Unknown, tcat.tc

A bear walks into a restaurant. And says “Waiter................... I’d like a steak” The waiter says “Sure, but why the big paws?”

— Bunnyfwefwe, reddit.com

A man walks into a bear. The bear says "unfortunate typo" and eats him.

— thedailyhominid, reddit.com

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear

— comradekaled, reddit.com

I just became a Dad two months ago and I'm still practicing my Dad jokes, bear with me. Don't worry though, he's a trained bear and completely under control.

— RabidDiabeetus, reddit.com

A large white bear walked into a bar, laughed, made out with the hottest girl, broke down sobbing, and had sex with a guy in the bathroom stall. A customer asked the bartender "Sheesh, what's his problem? "Bipolar."

— frowawayduh, reddit.com

A bear walks into a bar. He says to the bartender, "I'll have a............beer." The bartender responds, "what's with the big pause? The bear holds up his arms and says, "always had 'em.

— EmeraldStickyNote, reddit.com

Caveman and a bear walk into a bar. Bartender says "what's your story?" Caveman says... Bear with me...

— Colin_Kaepnodick, reddit.com

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