Quote
Catalog

Latest Quotes

(108,898 total)

James Bond: Is it conceivable that he could have used a false eye? M: Oh, do come along, Bond! Let's think of a more logical explanation, shall we?

— Lorenzo Semple Jr., James Bond, Sean Connery, Never Say Never Again

Speculation Occam's Razor

Patricia: Lentil delight, dandelion salad, goat's cheese. James Bond: Beluga caviar, quail’s eggs, vodka, foie gras—Strasbourg.

— Lorenzo Semple Jr., James Bond, Sean Connery, Never Say Never Again

Lentils Goat's Cheese Dandelion Salad Beluga Caviar Quail's Eggs

Largo: Are you a man who enjoys games? James Bond: Depends with whom I'm playing.

— Lorenzo Semple Jr., James Bond, Sean Connery, Never Say Never Again

Games Flirting

Miss Moneypenny: Have you got an assignment, James? James Bond: Yes, Moneypenny. I'm to eliminate all free radicals.

— Lorenzo Semple Jr., James Bond, Sean Connery, Never Say Never Again

Assignments free radicals

Cousin Vicki: I'm going steady, and I French kiss. Audrey Griswold: So? Everybody does that. Cousin Vicki: Yeah, but Daddy says I'm the best at it.

— John Hughes, Cousin Vicki, Jane Krakowski, National Lampoon's Vacation

Going Steady French Kissing Incest

Largo: Do you lose as gracefully as you win? James Bond: I don't know, I've never lost.

— Lorenzo Semple Jr., James Bond, Sean Connery, Never Say Never Again

Losing Winning Arrogance

I got laid off when they closed that asbestos factory, and wouldn't you know it, the army cuts my disability pension because they said that the plate in my head wasn't big enough.

— John Hughes, Cousin Eddie, Randy Quaid, National Lampoon's Vacation

Disability laid off plate in the head

Audrey Griswold: Mom, where can I go to the bathroom? Ellen Griswold: Find a bush Audrey! : Mom, where can I go to the bathroom? Ellen Griswold: Find a bush, Audrey!

— John Hughes, Ellen Griswold, Beverly D'Angelo, National Lampoon's Vacation

Public Urination bathrooms

Ellen Griswold: Lord, we loved this woman with all our heart. Audrey Griswold: Let's not overdo it, mom. Ellen Griswold: Shut up.

— John Hughes, Ellen Griswold, Beverly D'Angelo, National Lampoon's Vacation

Love Eulogies overdoing it Sarcasm

Clark: Real tomato ketchup, Eddie? Cousin Eddie: Oh, nothing but the best.

— John Hughes, Clark Griswold, Chevy Chase, National Lampoon's Vacation

Ketchup only the best

Ellen Griswold: I honestly don't think you're going to find the Grand Canyon on this road. Clark: Jesus, it's only the biggest damn hole in the world. Aunt Edna: Clark, watch your language! Clark: Make that the second biggest.

— John Hughes, Clark Griswold, Chevy Chase, National Lampoon's Vacation

Grand Canyon jesus Watch Your Language

Ellen Griswold: We're not really violent people. This is our first gun. Clark Griswold: No, it isn't.

— John Hughes, Clark Griswold, Chevy Chase, National Lampoon's Vacation

Guns gun collectors

Rusty Griswold: Is that a real gun, Mom? Ellen Griswold: I don't know, Rusty, but when this is all over, your father...may be going away for a little while.

— John Hughes, Ellen Griswold, Beverly D'Angelo, National Lampoon's Vacation

Guns trouble

Clark: We're from out of town. Man Giving Directions: No shit.

— John Hughes, Clark Griswold, Chevy Chase, National Lampoon's Vacation

Out of town no shit Painfully Obvious

I'm making this out for one thousand dollars. All you have to do is give me 300 dollars in cash and keep 700 dollars, all for doing nothing more than acting like a total creep.

— John Hughes, Clark Griswold, Chevy Chase, National Lampoon's Vacation

checks Cash Creep

[after driving off the road] Ellen Griswold: I think I broke my nose. Rusty Griswold: I stabbed my brain. Audrey Griswold: I just got my period.

— John Hughes, Ellen Griswold, Beverly D'Angelo, National Lampoon's Vacation

Car Crash broken nose period

Lasky: Has your father ever killed anyone? Rusty: Just a dog. Oh, and my Aunt Edna. Clark: Hey you can't prove that, Russ.

— John Hughes, Clark Griswold, Chevy Chase, National Lampoon's Vacation

Murder reasonable doubt

I don't give a frog's fat ass who went through what. We need money! Hey, Russ, wanna look through Aunt Edna's purse?

— John Hughes, Clark Griswold, Chevy Chase, National Lampoon's Vacation

Theft frog's fat ass

[In Cousin Normy's backyard in the pouring rain] Ellen Griswold: We can't leave her on the patio! Clark: Would you rather I slipped her in the night deposit box at the funeral home?

— John Hughes, Clark Griswold, Chevy Chase, National Lampoon's Vacation

patio pouring rain Morbid Humor

Hey, hey, easy kids. Everybody in the car. Boat leaves in two minutes...or perhaps you don't want to see the second largest ball of twine on the face of the earth, which is only four short hours away?

— John Hughes, Clark Griswold, Chevy Chase, National Lampoon's Vacation

vacation ball of twine

WWWWWWWWWWWMMMWWWWWWWWWWWWM& K &&&&MM&MM&&MMMMM&&K WWWWWWWWWWMMMMMWWWWWWWWWWWWWM& KMK &K K KKKK&M&&&&KM&MMWWWWWWMWMK WWWWWWWWWWMMMMMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWM& KKK&K&& KKKKK&&&&K&&&&&MWWWWWWWWMWWWMM&&K K&KK&&K WWWWWWWWWMM&&&MMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWM& &&KKKKKKKKKK K&&&&&&&MWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW&&KK&K && WWMMMWWWMM&&&&&&MWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW K&KKKKK&KK K&&M&MWMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMMMWWWMM&& WWMMMMMMM&&&KKKK&MMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW &&&&&K&& &K K&&&&&WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMMMWMM&&MK WWWMMMM&&&KKKK KK&MWWWWWWWWWWWWWW KK&&KKK K&&WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMW&MMM&&KK WWWMM&&&KKKKKK KK&MMWWWWWWWWWWWW KKKK&&&KK&K KK&&MWWWWMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW&MM&KK WWWMM&&KK KK&&MWWWWWWWWW KKK&&&&KKKKKK KMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMWMM&KK WWWM&&KK KKK&&MMWWWWW KK&&&&&&M&&&& K&K MWWWWWWWWWWWWWMMWWWWWW&&W&&&KK WWWM&K KKKKKKK KK&&MMWM KK&&KK&K&KKK&&&&K K WMMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMWWMWWM&K& KK WWWM& K&&&K&KK KKKK&&M KK&KKK&M&&K&&&&K& K&MWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMMWMMMK&KK WWM&K K&&&&&&&&&&KKKKKKKK& KK&&KKKK&&K&&&&&&K&MKWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWM&MMK& WM&K &&MMMMM&&&&&&&&K&&K K&&&&&&&&&MM&MM&&& MMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMWMM&&&M&& WM& K&MMWWWWWWMM&&MM&M&& &&&K&&K&K&&MMKK&&&&&WMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMWWWMM&&K W&K KK&MMWWWWWWWWWWWMMM&& &&&&&KK&K&MWMM&&&&&MWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWM&&K &K K&&MMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWK &M&&&&&&M&&&MM&&&&&MMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMMK & K&MMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW KM&&&MMWWMMMMWMMM&&W&MWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW&&KK K M K&MMWWWWWWWWWWWWWW KK&&&&&MMMM&M&MMM&&MWWWWWWMMWWWWWW&MWWWWWWWWWW&WKK WM &&MMWWWWWWWWWWWWW KK&KKM& KK& &&& &KK&MMWWWWK MMMK&K&&&K&MK&K KKK K&KKKK WWM K&MMMWWWWWWWWWWWW KK &KK KK K WWM K&&MMWWWWWWWWWWWW K KMM KK&MWWWWWWWWWWWWW& K WWWW K&MWWWWWWWWWWWWWW& &&K MWWWW KK&MWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW K&MMWWM&K KK &&WWMMK &MM K&MWWWWWWWWWWWWWWM KKKKK MWW& K&MWWWWWWWWWWWWWK KMWWWK KK&MMWWWWWWWWWW& &WWM K KK&MMWWWWWWWW&K MWMK K KKMMWWWWWWWMK KM& KK& && K &&WM& KKKMKKK K&MMWWWWWWWK KKK K&K KK & KWW&&&K KKK K K&&MMWWWWWM KKKKK&&K K&MWKKK K&WMWMK & K&&MMWWWWW W KK&&&&M&M&&&& KKKM&MMMMM&&&K K K&MMMMM& KK K K&&MMMMW MM K&&M&MMMMM&M&MM&MWWWWWWWMKKK && MMWWM& KM&K&MM&&KKKK&KK KKKK W& KK&&MMMMWWWMWWWWWWWWWWWWW&KK KMM&MWWW&& K &WWWWWWWWWW&K & K&&&&&MMWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWKK &&&MM&WWWMK &&&MMWWWMWWWM&M&K

. . . ::. .... . , , .,, . .,,:: ::,,, , ... , : :: ., ..,:: ::, . .,,.. . . . .: : , .,. .. . .... : . , ,., ,,. :.:, . ... , :, , : :: ::, :,,,:. . , ,:,:,,., ::,,. ,. . , . . , : . . , . .: .. .. , : : : , .. , :,. :,,. ,: :: : :., : :, : : ,, .:: :.:,,: , .. , ,. , . , . .. : ,, . ,.,. , : , .:,. :, . , , .: ::. :, . ::, :,,,,, ,,:,:. : ::,. . : .. , :: , .,: ,,,. . . ,, .. :,, : . . .:, :,,.. ::,,....,:: , , .. ::, . ::,..,.,.:: :::,, :,. ..,. :,,,, ::. . :,,,,,,,,, ,,: : . :,. .,:. , ,..: :, : :,,: ::,: :, ::,, , :,.. ...,. :, .., , :: . ,: :,::,: :.. . ,. : :. .,:,.. : : . ,.,. , ., , ,: :,::: :: :,: .. .,. :. ., : : ., : : ,,: , : ::,,, ,, ..... .., ::: :,,.,,:::, , : . , , ,,..: ::,. ..,,, .::: :..,:::::,,. :: : : : . : :: :: ,..,::, ,.,: :,.,: ::,,. : ::::: : : .,.,: : ::: :::. ,,,,,,,:. .,,: ::,:::::,,. , :::::: : ,: :: :,. :,.,:. ,::: :::::::,,. : ::::: :: ::: ::,, ,:: :..,,. ,:: :::::,,,,,. : ::::: :,: ::: :::, ,,::. .,,, ,: :::::,,,.,.. ::: : :, ,:: :,:,,: ,,:. .,.. ,:: :::,:,,,.,. .

}<<< < } }**<<<<****}*}*<~<}**<*<* ~*} }}}}}*}}}}}}}}}}} }< ~ }}}*<<~~~~ < }}} }}}}*}}}}}}}} ~ } *}}}**<<****<<~~< ~} } }}}}} }}}}}}}}}}} < ~~ } }}}}}*<*}} *}}**~~ *~ * }}}}} }} }}}}***}*}}} ~ ~< } }*** }*} }<**<} ~ } <} } }}}}}}}}}} ~ ~~<~ ~ } } }}} }} *}**}<<< ~ <} }}}}}}} } }}}}}} } }}*****}<<<*<< <} }}}}}} <} * } } }}} }***<<~<<*< ~ <} }}}}}}} ~< }} } ****}*<*~~~~**~}~ ~* }}}}}}} ~} }}*}}}<<~~ ~*<~ < *} }}} } < }*****<*<~~~~<}< } } }}}}}} }} }}*****<~~ ~*~} ~ } } } }} <<}< ***}}*<~~ ~ ~ ** } <<< }}}}*****~~~~ < ~<<} }}}*****<~ ~ }}} ~ ~~< }**}***<<~ } * *}}**}}**~~ * }}}*}}*}*<< } }}} }}**}}***<~ }}} <<}} *}*} }***}**<<~ ~~~*} ~ ~ *<~ **<<~<~ *} }~ ~~~ <**<<<<~~~ }}}}}}}}}} ~~~~<}} * } < ~ } }*~ ~~~<<~ } }*<<<~~~~~~<<<*} }~~~~*} ~ ~~ }< ~~~ }}}**<<~~~ ~ *~~~~* * }**<*} }*< ~<~} }}}~ ~} *<<~ ~ * }***<<*<<<<<~~~~ <~~~<} ~ *}* * ~<} }<<< } }*<~ ~ ~ <*<<<<<<<<<<<~<~~~~ *~~~~*} < } } }~ <* * }}*~ ~ ~ ~ ~~~<<<<<<<<<<<<~~ ~~* <~~~~<}} } < ~* ~ <<*~ <<< ~~~ ~~<<<<<<<<<<<<~ }}} }<~~~~~**} ~ } < <<~* << **< ~ ~ ~~~~~<<<<<<<<*<~ ~~ < }*<~~~~~~~<*}} } } ~ <****<*< *<**}<<<~ } ~ < ~ * *< } ~<<<~<~~~~~~ ~ ~~<<<<<***< < }*<~~~~~ ~~~~**} } ~~ } }< ~<*<<**<<~~ ~~~~<<<**<< **<~~~~ ~ ~ ~~<*} } *~ ~} } ~~< } } *< <}}} }}} }<~<~~ ~<<<~<<**<< ~ ~ }*<~~~~ ~~~~<*} *<~~~ <} ~ ~ }*<<<<<~ <} } }}<<~ ~~<<~<<<<<<~ * <~~~~ ~~~~*} ~ ~ ~~ }}}*<~~ ~~~ ~~~<<<<<<<<~~ * }<~~~ ~~~~~*}} * < ~~ ~} }<<~ ~ ~~~~~<<<<~<~~ < *~~~~ ~~~~<*} < } ~~ * } }*<~~ ~~~<<<<<<<<<~~~~ }*<~~~~ ~~~~<<}} < ~~ * }}*~ ~~~<<<<<<<<<<~~

UVo j UVUoUVU UUU UV jjjj UV oV U V U UVUVoVVVVojoVoojjooooV jjjjjj j UV VU U U Voojjj jjj jj j joVU UU U UUUVj oj jjj j j j ojjUVU UUU UUoVoVo jjj jj oj jj oooojjjjjjj oUUU U UU UUVVoj j j jooo j jjjoooojjjjjjjjjjj UU oVVVU UUVUVUU UUVVoo jjj j jjooVVooooojjjjjjjjj UUU jjoVUV UUU UVUVojj jjjjj oo j j jooVVVVoooojojjjjjjj UUUUUUUUUU j jjVUUUU VU UUVVVj jojj oooooj jjoooVVoVVooooojjjjjjj UUUVVUUUUUUUU VUUU U UU UUoooojjjjojojVVVoj ojjooVVVVVVVVoooojjjjjjj j j UUVVVVVU UUUU ooUoV V U U VVooooooooVVVVVVVVo ojjoooVVVVVVoVoooojjjjj j UVVVVVVUU UUUU joV UU UoVoVoooVVVooUVUVVo j ooooooVVVVVVVVVoooo jjj jjjjj UVooooVV jV UUUVVVoVVVVVUVUUVVooj o VooooVVVVVUVVVVVojjjjjjjjjjjjjj UVVoooVVUU joV U UUUUUVVUUVVUUUVVVo jooooVVVUUUUVVVVVooojjjjjjjjjjjj UVoooooVVU jV UVVVVVVUVUUUUVooo ojjjoVVUVUUVVVVVVoojoojjjjjjj UoooooVVU oU UVVVoVVVUUVUUVojjj VoooooVUUUUUUVVVVoooojjjjjjjj jj UVVoooooVU oU UUUVVVUVVVVUVVVojj VooooVVVUUUUUUUVVoooojjjjjjjjjjj VooooooooVVU U VVU UV UUUVVUVUVVUVVoo VoooVVVUUUUUUVVVVVooojjjjjjj jjj o joooooVVU V VUU UUUVUUUUUVVUUUUUUVVoj jVooVoVUUUUUUUVVVoooojjjjjjj j o jjooVVUU j jVVUU VU UU U U U U UUVVVooVoj o jooooVUUUUUUUUVVVVooojjjjjjjjjjj j jjoVVU oVVUUU VVj joj jjj V UVUUUUUVUU UVUU VUooVUo jjjoVVVUUUUUUVVVoojj j o joVU VUU UUUo o oVUUVVVoVUUVVVVVVoj ooVVVVUVVVVooj V joVU jVUVUUUV jjVUVVoooV Vjooooj joooVVojj U jooVU oVUVVVoo joVUUVoj jojooVUUVVooj oU Vo jjj U joVU j oVVVVUoj jjoVU oj jjoVV Uoj V UUUo jV U joVUU VVVVUVo j joVUUUU UUVVojj jVU Vo oUUVUUUUUVUUVoj jjj joVUU oVVVUoVVjjoUUVoj jV Uj jj jooVU U VVVVVUVVVVVV jVU UVo V ojj joVVU oVVVVVUVUUo V UUVoVVVU V j jjU joUo o V Voj joVUU V joVVVVUUUUVojoVUV UU UjoojoVUU UU VU U oVoVVV VoVo oo Uoj joVU Uj ooVVUU UU oooVUVU Voj joUVUU V j j jooVV UUVVV joj j Vo joVU UUV oooVVU UVojj joV U V oooojooo oVVooVj joj UVoj jooVU UU o oooVVU U U U o jVooVVVUUUUUVVVoVVUU UVojojjoj UVoj joVUUU UV oooVVUU U U V VoV UUVVVjjVjjjj UUVVoj jooVUUUUUU oo ojoVUU V V jVVU U UVVVooj jjj UUVVoj jooVUUUUUUUUUUV U oojoVUU U oj oV UUUVVVVojj

WWWWWMWWWWWM K&K&&&MMMMWWM& WWWWMMWWWWWWW& MM&&&&MMMWWWWWWWWMWW&K WMMM&&&MWWWWW& &MMM&K&MWWWWWWWWWWMM&K WWM&K&KK&WWWW K&MMMM&&&WWWWWWWWWWM&K WMK &&&&&&&W &MMM&MMKMWWWWWWWWWM&K KK K KKK W& &MWWMMMW MMMMMMM&WWWWWWWWWWWM&KKKK&K KK&KK M KMWWWWWWW WMMMWWMMWWWWWWWWWWWWMKKKKKK KKKK M &MWWWWWW &MWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWMMMM&&&& KK&&KK W KMWWWWWW K&& &K K K KK&KK WW KMWWWWWWK &K K K & & K&WWWWWW KK K &WM &MWWWWW KKKK K KWW & K KMWWWW K&&M&K &MMMWW K & K&WWWW K&MMWMWWWWWW&MWWW &MWMMMMK KK &&KK& &MMWWWWWWWM&MMWM MWWWWW&KKK K &MMK& K&MWWWWWWWW&K &WM KMWWWWWM& &K &MMW &&MMWWWW&&&&MWWW MWWWWM& WK KWW K&&MWWM KWM MWWMKK W& &M&MW&KWWWMK MMWWM&K WWK K&M&MM & & &&WMK WW& K&K&& KW &W WM& KKKW& KW &&&K &&&&K MMM KKK KK K&KK

,.:, ::,,. ,, ::., :.. ,,, :, .. .. , . , . : : , , .: : ,,: . . : , :: . :.,: , . , ,: :,,..: . : :..,: :: . .. :.::. : ,, , :,, ,: : , , :: .: : . ,, ,:, : , :,:,,, : , .. ,..::,: : , . :,., :,,: : . ::.,: ,: :,. :::. .,: :.. :, :,: ::, .,,: :,. , :, :: ::, ..,: ,, ::: :. , : ,, ..,: ::: : ,,,..,: :: : , .,: .. . :. : .,: . . :, ,. ., ..,: :. : . : . , .,,.. ., ..,,. : ::: ,, :. , ..., ...... :::::: . , .... .. ::::::::::: , , : : ,.. .....

* < < < }~~ ~<<* }* ~ ~ *<}* ~ < }*~* < ~ <~ ~ ~ ~ }~ } < < ~* * ~**< ~ }} }* *< < * * < <~ }}**< * ~ }< ~ **~* ~< ~*}}}}* }**} < * <*<~}< ~ } <** *<<<< ~<*}} < << }****} * * ** *< ~ <** }~~< < ****} }*<* *~ * <**}}*<<~ < }}*}} ~<< <~ ~*}}}}*<~ ~ }}}}} < }< ~**}}}**~ ~ }}}} }~* * ~ <*}}}}*< * }}}} ~~} * * ~<} }< }}}*}} } < <* * }}**}} } }<~ ~ < * }< <} } }}****}}}} < ***<* }< ~ * }} *~ ~*} *~ ********}} } * ~ *~ * ~}}< ~ ~*}}* }*<*<<*<**} *} ** } } **~~ <*~ ~~ *<<<<<<<<<<<~} } ~ ~<<~ << }*<<<<<<<<<<~ < }} *}} }}*<<*} * ~~~ ~ }*<<<<~~~~~~ <** *}}} }<~ }*<<<~~~~ ~ ~ * }** * }}}*<<~~~~ ~ ~} }} <~ }}*<<~~ } ~<*< ~<* ~

U VooVVVoooj VVoooojjj jU VoojUoo VVVVoooooj U VoooVoojj oUUUVVVoooo j V VoVoUUojj VUUUUUVVoooo UU oU UUUU Ujj o o U UVVVooo UVU jV Vjjj VU VVVooo UVU V Uojj UUU UVVVVV jVUU UVjoj U UUUVVV o jV V VU U U UV Uoj jo o U jU Vo jVU UVo U Uj Voj o o jV o Uo U j j Vj oU j U j o U j j o o o U UUVoV VUUU Uo UVVVo j Uj oU UV U UVVo V jVU jVU V U Vj Uoj oU oV U V UUV o jjjoV VoU V UVoj o jjjooU oVU U j U UVoj jjj V jjjjooojVU Uo UVVj jjjj j jjjj joV U U U jU Vjo joj o jojoU U o U U j jj Uj oj VU V j j V j oVUV V U U UVj jjoo UVUo VUVjj jooUU UVUVoo j oUUUVj j jjj Voooojj oVVVoj j oojjjj oVUVVjj ojoojj jjj VoojoVj joj j