“Harvey: You know, the only reason I took Home Ec. was so I could eat during class; Coach says I’ve still got to bulk up, and carbo-loading can get pretty lonely... Sabrina: Well, we’ll keep you company any time you have to eat. Jenny: Yeah, we’re good at that. Harvey: Hey, I’m going to the pizza…”Tagged: Sports, Home Ec, School, food, Pizza
“Libby: Come on Harvey, let’s hit the floor. Harvey: Actually, Libby, I don’t dance. Libby: Excuse me? This is a dance, guess what we do here? Harvey: Well you see for me, dance is sort of a metaphor. Libby: For what? Harvey: I don’t know, something else?”Tagged: dance, Date, Metaphor, joke, dumb
“Sabrina: ...So then, Jenny’s dad landed on Park Place, and to pay the rent he had to borrow money from her little brother. It was super-funny. Harvey: My family can’t play board games, not since the Pictionary incident. I still can’t talk about it...”Tagged: Games, Family, joke, Competition, Monopoly
“Sabrina: Are you kidding? I’d love to meet the Violent Femmes! When? Where? Harvey: Well, they’ll be signing CD’s at Music City in Boston tonight at midnight. Sabrina: Midnight! That’s perfect. I have no conflicting plans. But I still have to ask my aunts. Harvey: Just tell them what I told my…”Tagged: The Violent Femmes, Music, Astrology, Astronomy, joke
“Sabrina: So, what did you wanna tell me that couldn’t wait till twelve thirty-seven? Harvey: Something I should have said a long time ago: I think we should go steady. Sabrina: Steady? I’d like that. I’d like that a lot. Harvey: And I want to give you something so we’ll never forget this moment.…”Tagged: Love, Romantic, joke, Relationships, Steady
“Valerie: 'S,' because she’s so sublime, 'A,' because she’s awesome all the time! Harvey: 'B,' because she’s the best babe in school, 'R,' because she really makes me drool! Mr. Kraft: And 'I' is for the icon she’s become, 'N' is ‘cause she’s great, she makes me numb! All: And 'A,' it’s redundant to…”Tagged: Song, poem, Poetry, Cheerleader, Cheerleading
“Wait a minute. How are you gonna quit magic? Go to Witch Watchers?”Tagged: Pun, joke, witch, Magic, Weight Watchers
“Susie: The Fly is about body dysmorphia. Harvey: Isn’t it about a guy who turns into a giant fly?”Tagged: The Fly, Body Dysmorphia, Literal, obvious
“But please don't ever do that again. Use magic with me. Or on me, or near me. Never again.”Tagged: Magic, Warning