Season 3

“Laverne: My neck moved!! Lenny: No, it didn't, it's right under your head.”

— Judy Pioli, Laverne De Fazio, Penny Marshall, imdb.com

“Lenny: Boy, am I going to dream about her tonight! Squiggy: Just don't make those gurgly sounds...”

— Michael Weinberger, Lenny, Michael McKean, imdb.com

“My family may have left Poland in disgrace, but some day we'll return the same way!”

— Judy Pioli, Paula A. Roth, Lenny, Michael McKean, imdb.com

“Laverne: Squiggy, true or false... Squiggy: True! Laverne: I didn't ask the question yet! Squiggy: Yes, you did. You said, 'Squiggy, true or false?' I'm Squiggy, that would be true.”

— Chris Thompson, Andrew 'Squiggy' Squiggman, David L. Lander, imdb.com

“Boy, you just stepped straight off the bus right into Filth Town, didn't you?”

— Nicholas DeMarco, Shirley Feeney, Cindy Williams, imdb.com

“I hate to go down to unemployment. It's embarrassing down there. Everybody down there knows you don't have a job.”

— Marc Sotkin, Shirley Feeney, Cindy Williams, imdb.com

“What I don't have in strength, I make up for in what I lack up here! [Points to head]”

— Arthur Silver, Andrew 'Squiggy' Squiggman, David L. Lander, imdb.com

“Go ahead and laugh. Just like they laughed at Columbus right before he discovered Ohio.”

— Marc Sotkin, Andrew 'Squiggy' Squiggman, David L. Lander, imdb.com

“Laverne, you can't marry a man you don't love!...Something bad will happen...you'll grow restless....You'll start calling the milkman Joe!”

— Emily Marshall, Shirley Feeney, Cindy Williams, imdb.com

“Shirley: Laverne, I'm telling you, flying is safer than driving! Nobody has ever crashed into a cloud! Laverne: Yeah, well nobody ever fell 40,000 feet from a DeSoto, either.”

— Chris Thompson, Shirley Feeney, Cindy Williams, imdb.com