“Guillermo is my familiar, but sometimes he's a little too familiar, you know what I mean? I mean, he's always just there.”Tagged: Vampie Familars
“Cashier: Did you just throw a coin at me? Nandor: Yes. Cashier: Sir, you can't be throwing ancient coins at me. Nandor: Guillermo, stab this man. Guillermo: He's joking. Nandor: Stab him. Guillermo: I tried, and...here you go, man. Cashier: Thank you so much. Nandor: [to Guillermo] You kind of…”Tagged: Stabbing, Coins, joking, Disobedience
“They would call me Nandor the relentless because I would never relent.”Tagged: Relentless, Unrelenting
“Vampire sex is like pizza, in that even when it's bad it's good. It's designed to be enjoyed by eight or more people. There's a choice of toppings.And in the morning, you're like, 'Aah! Why do I have puncture wounds on my penis?’”Tagged: Nandor the Relentless, Vampire Sex, Sex and Pizza
“Government Official: Please describe the right to bear arms. Nandor: If it's a nice day, you should have the right to bare your arms. Government Official: All right.Moving on.”Tagged: Witty Dialouge , Right to Bear Arms
“It seems that, uh, government workers are immune to hypnotism. It's like their souls are dead or something.”Tagged: Government Workers, The Soulless