Season

Season 5

by Craig Robinson, Ed Helms, Ellie Kemper, Mindy Kaling, Clark Duke and 37 others

The fifth season of the American television comedy The Office premiered in the United States in the 2008–2009 television season on NBC on September 25, 2008 and concluded on May 14, 2009. The fifth season consisted of 28 half-hours of material, divided in

(19 total)

Characters

Steve Carell (12)Michael Scott (12)Paul Lieberstein (7)Mindy Kaling (5)Rainn Wilson (5)Dwight Schrute (5)Jennifer Celotta (4)Lee Eisenberg (1)Aaron Shure (1)Kelly Kapoor (1)

“I've never been a kiss up. It's just not how I operate. I mean I've always subscribed to the idea that if you really want to impress your boss, you go in there and you do mediocre work, half-heartedly.”

— B.J. Novak,, Jim Halpert, John Krasinski, imdb.com

Tagged: Kiss Up, Hardly Working, How to impress your boss

“You better learn your rules. If you don't, you'll be eaten in your sleep.”

— Jennifer Celotta, Dwight Schrute, Rainn Wilson, imdb.com

Tagged: Learn Your Rules, Nursery Rhymes

“Nothing stresses me out. Except having to seek the approval of my inferiors.”

— Paul Lieberstein, Dwight Schrute, Rainn Wilson, imdb.com

Tagged: Stress, stress relief

“Smoking is gonna save lives.”

— Paul Lieberstein, Dwight Schrute, Rainn Wilson, imdb.com

Tagged: smoking, Fire Drill

“I am a theatrical person. Growing up I always thought I would become an actor, because, I have these memorization tricks that I use. For instance, I learned the Pledge of Allegiance by singing it to the tune of Old Macdonald: I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America / And to t…”

— Mindy Kaling, Michael Scott, Steve Carell, imdb.com

Tagged: Pledge of Allegiance, Theatrics, actor, Singing

“Michael: You wanna hear a lie? Toby: What? Michael: I... think you're great. You're my best friend.”

— Mindy Kaling, Michael Scott, Steve Carell, imdb.com

Tagged: Liar, Best Friends

“I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.”

— Paul Lieberstein, Michael Scott, Steve Carell, imdb.com

Tagged: I Don't Know What To Do

“Growing up I performed my own circumcision.”

— Aaron Shure, Dwight Schrute, Rainn Wilson, imdb.com

Tagged: Circumcision

“Get a friend, loser.”

— Lester Lewis, Dwight Schrute, Rainn Wilson, imdb.com

Tagged: friends and losers, insults

“I think sometimes people are really mean to the hot, popular girl.”

— Mindy Kaling, Kelly Kapoor, Mindy Kaling, imdb.com

Tagged: Popularity, people are mean

“I tried, I tried. I tried to talk to Toby and be his friend but that is like trying to be friends with an evil snail. I feel like I'm dying inside. I feel like Neve Campbell in Scream II. She thinks she can go off to college and be happy and then the murderer comes back and starts killing off all of…”

— Jennifer Celotta, Mindy Kaling, Michael Scott, Steve Carell, imdb.com

Tagged: Tried, Friend, Simile Examples, evil snail, Scream 2

“An office is for not dying. An office is a place to live life to the fullest, to the max, to... An office is a place where dreams come true.”

— Paul Lieberstein, Michael Scott, Steve Carell, imdb.com

Tagged: Office, Dying, Life life, fullest, dreams come true

“No, Rose, they are not breathing. And they have no arms or legs...Where are they? You know what? If we come across somebody with no arms or legs do we bother resuscitating them? I mean, what quality of life do we have there?”

— Paul Lieberstein, Michael Scott, Steve Carell, imdb.com

Tagged: CPR, not breathing, practice, arms, legs

“You will not die! Stanley! Stanley! Barack is President! You are black, Stanley!”

— Paul Lieberstein, Michael Scott, Steve Carell, imdb.com

Tagged: Die, Death, Barack Obama, President, african american

“Don't ever, for any reason, do anything for anyone, for any reason, ever, no matter what. No matter where. Or who, or who you are with, or where you are going or... or where you've been... ever. For any reason, whatsoever.”

— Jennifer Celotta, Michael Scott, Steve Carell, amazon.com

Tagged: Reason, Matter, whatsover, Nonsensical

“Well, well, well, how the turntables.”

— Warren Lieberstein, Charlie Grandy, Michael Scott, Steve Carell, amazon.com

Tagged: tables turn, roles switch, misworded

“I have got to make sure that YouTube comes down to tape this.”

— Paul Lieberstein, Michael Scott, Steve Carell, amazon.com

Tagged: Youtube, tape, comes down

“Tell him to call me ASAP as possible.”

— Lee Eisenberg, Gene Stupnitsky, Michael Scott, Steve Carell, amazon.com

Tagged: Redundant, ASAP, call me

“Sometimes I'll start a sentence and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way.”

— Jennifer Celotta, Michael Scott, Steve Carell, amazon.com

Tagged: Sentence, Going, Hope, Start, lost