Latest Quotes

“Yeah, I'm seeing a lot of rollie pollies under here. Are they gonna be okay?”

— Donick Cary, Jack Griffin, Glenn Howerton, Happiness

“You know what I'm going to do? Buy one of those Japanese talking toilets. See what that has to say.”

— Donick Cary, Jack Griffin, Glenn Howerton, Happiness

“So I'm not gonna teach you anything in here, okay? If you keep your mouth shut, you get an A. If you say anything to anybody, you get an F. Welcome to AP Bio.”

— Donick Cary, Jack Griffin, Glenn Howerton, Happiness

“They work hard all day long and then they reward themselves with simple things.”

— Donick Cary, Jack Griffin, Glenn Howerton, Happiness

“At one point, I saw a girl, a child really, eat an entire spoonful of just mayo.”

— Donick Cary, Jack Griffin, Glenn Howerton, Happiness

“Six years ago, Breaking Bad ended. As far was TV show finales go, it was pretty strong—even if the writers had a lot of other ideas for how it all could have ended—and it inspired one of the best spin-offs of all time, Better Call Saul.”

— Luke Darby , The 'Breaking Bad' Movie Is Hitting Netflix MUCH Sooner Than You Think

“I'm like a tiger gettin' ready to spring!”

— Jane Anderson, Bobby Riggs, Ron Silver, When Billie Beat Bobby

“Charles... It's the Queen. So here's the deal, fuck nut. Stupid fuck slut. You're embarrassing your country. Win and I'll make you a knight. I'm totally allowed to. I did it to that bald guy from Star Trek as a joke. Don't let us down anymore. OK? Stupid fuck slut. I've been drinking...”

— Murray Miller, Queen Elizabeth, June Squibb, 7 Days in Hell

“The man who said ‘I'd rather be lucky than good’ saw deeply into life. People are afraid to face how great a part of life is dependent on luck. It's scary to think so much is out of one's control. There are moments in a match when the ball hits the top of the net, and for a split second, it can eith…”

— Woody Allen, Chris Wilton, Jonathan Rhys Meyers, Match Point

“Hit this one, and I'll sleep with you. [ball hits an official] Too bad. You could've used the workout.”

— Adam Brooks, Jennifer Flackett, Mark Levin, Lizzie Bradbury, Kirsten Dunst, Wimbledon

“Angel: This seat's taken. Ferris: By who? Angel: My guardian angel. Ferris: Well, she'll have to sit on my lap. Angel: She's a he. Ferris: Then I'll have to sit on his lap.”

— Kimi Peck, Dalene Young, Angel, Kristy McNichol, Little Darlings

“I'm not saying women are better. I've never said that. I'm saying we deserve some respect.”

— Simon Beaufoy, Billie Jean King, Emma Stone, Battle of the Sexes

“Why can't I have a normal dog like everybody else?”

— Charles M. Schulz, Charlie Brown, Duncan Watson, Race for Your Life, Charlie Brown

“You're doomed! You're all doomed!”

— Victor Miller, Crazy Ralph, Walt Gorney, Friday the 13th

“Iris, if you were a melody... I used only the good notes.”

— Nancy Meyers, Miles, Jack Black, The Holiday

“Louise McKendrick: Charles, stop burbling. Charles McKendrick: I haven't burbled in years!”

— Nancy Meyers, David Swift, Charles Shyer, Louise McKendrick, Cathleen Nesbitt, The Parent Trap

“According to the map, we've only gone four inches.”

— Peter Farrelly, Bobby Farrelly, Bennett Yellin, Harry Dunne, Jeff Daniels, Dumb and Dumber

“I know it's terrible trying to have any faith when people are doing such horrible... But you know what I sometimes think? I think the world may be going through a phase, the way I was with mother. It'll pass. Maybe not hundreds of years, but someday. - I still believe, in spite of everything, that p…”

— Frances Goodrich, Anne Frank, Millie Perkins, The Diary of Anne Frank

“Mama Mousekewitz: It's the end of the world. Papa Mousekewitz: No, it's worse.”

— David Kirschner, Mama Mousekewitz, Erica Yohn, An American Tail

“As the 21st century began, human evolution was at a turning point. Natural selection, the process by which the strongest, the smartest, the fastest, reproduced in greater numbers than the rest, a process which had once favored the noblest traits of man, now began to favor different traits. Most scie…”

— Mike Judge, Etan Cohen, Narrator (voice), Earl Mann, Idiocracy