“Roger, I think I've found a way off this island! Is there such a thing as a time crab?”Tagged: Island, Time, time travel, Crab
“Oh, I love your religion ... for the crazy! Virgin birth. Water into wine. It's like Harry Potter, but it causes genocide and bad folk music.”Tagged: Religion, crazy, virgin, Wine, Genocide
“What, no way! Wait, why is this wrong? Next to 'Miranda Rights,' I wrote, 'Miranda has the right to a decent man who will help her raise her baby.' Are these questions not about Sex and the City?”Tagged: Miranda Rights, Law Enforcement, Sex And The City, Wrong, Confused
“Jeff: How's you huge vagina? Hayley: Oh, yerhujeva? She's good. She's back in Croatia for the winter with the rest of the Gina family.”Tagged: Vagina, Goodd, Sarcasm, Croatia, Rest
“Hayley: Jeff, I don't wanna go to Mexico! Okay, that's your plan! We need a plan we can both be excited about! Jeff: A new plan... New Mexico!”Tagged: New, New plan, Mexico, New Mexico, Traveling
“You know why Chinese couples can't have their own Caucasian babies? Because two Wongs don't make a white.”Tagged: Jokes, Chinease, Couples, babies, Punny
“Steve, shooting a gun is like being intimate with a woman. First, you inspect it to make sure it's clean. Then you grab it on the butt and jam the magazine in. If it doesn't fit, make it.”Tagged: Sex, Intimate, Gun, Clean, Steps