“Jerry: It sounds like you're about to say Jacob is your lover. Leonard Smith: No, no, no. Jacob is your mother's lover. I watch them. Sometimes from a chair, sometimes from a closet. Almost always dressed as Superman.”Tagged: Lovers, Parents, Watching, Sex, Chair
“Listen, if the situation keeps on darkening, then you gotta do yourself a favor and pop by Pirates Of The Pancreas. I mean, the top priority is to, you know, get you guys out of there, but, I mean, if that becomes impossible then you gotta treat yourself.”Tagged: Treat Yourself, situation, Darkening, Priorties
“You're the little brother. You're not the cause of your parents' misery, you're just a symptom of it.”Tagged: Brother, Siblings, Misery, Symptom
“Nobody exists on purpose, nobody belongs anywhere, everybody's gonna die. Come watch TV.”Tagged: TV, Existence, Belonging, Death
“Beth: When two people create a life together, they set aside their previous lives as individuals. Jerry: Gimme a break! We're not heroes for having unprotected sex on prom night.”Tagged: Marriage, Sex, Unprotected Sex, Prom Night
“Bird Person: Morty, do you know what wubba lubba dub dub means? Morty: Oh, that's just Rick's stupid nonsense catchphrase. Bird Person: It's not nonsense at all. In my people's tongue, it means, I am in great pain. Please help me.”Tagged: Catchphrase, Nonsense, Pain, Meaning
“And this is why you don't invite a Floopy Doop and a Shmoopy Doop to the same party.”Tagged: party, Invitation, tension
“Rick: When's the last time you got laid, 'pers? Birdperson: It has been a... challenging mating season for Birdperson.”Tagged: Laid, Mating, Mating Season, Challenging
“I love watching bukkake. I mean, like, I don't know if I would personally ever do it.”Tagged: Porn, Sex, Sex Acts, Watching
“It's not the same, Summer! Lincler's a crazed maniac. He's just a misguided effort of mine to create a morally neutral super-leader by combining the DNA of Adolf Hitler and Abraham Lincoln. Turns out that ehh-it just adds up to a lame, weird... loser.”Tagged: Abraham Lincoln, Adolf Hitler, DNA, Maniac, Loser
“Morty: Can you fly a Black Hawk? Mr. President: Can the pope's **** fit through a donut? Morty: Eh... I'm not sure? Mr. President: Exactly!”Tagged: Pope, Dick Jokes, Donut
“Mr. President, if I've learned one thing today, it's that sometimes you have to not give a fuck!”Tagged: Mr. President, cool, Learning
“See? Our cup runneth over. Now, who wants to go shopping for a brand-new motherfuckin' world?! All right!”Tagged: End of the World, Shopping, World
“Yeah motherfucker yeah get it get some, right up your fucking bitch ass you fuck! Guess who just discovered a new element! Think you could do that Morty? You think anyonne but me could do it ever in a billion years? Do you think if God existed he could do it? The answer is no. If God exists its…”Tagged: Element, God, Existence