Season 2

“I’ve never met anyone who doesn’t eat sugar. Only heard about ’em. And they all live in this Godless place called Santa Monica.”

— Leann Bowen, Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, David Rom, Ted Lasso, Jason Sudeikis, imdb.com

“Well, you know my philosophy when it comes to cats, babies, and apologies, Coach. You gotta let 'em come to you.”

— Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Jason Sudeikis, Ted Lasso, Jason Sudeikis, imdb.com

“Keeley, a good mentor hopes you will move on. A great mentor knows you will.”

— Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Jason Sudeikis, Leslie Higgins, Jeremy Swift, imdb.com

“You know, fellas, we make a lot of choices in our lives every single day, ranging from, 'Am I really about to eat something called Greek Yogurt?' To, 'Should I leave my family and take a job halfway around the world?' Me choosing not to be forthright with y'all, that was a bad choice.”

— Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Jason Sudeikis, Ted Lasso, Jason Sudeikis, imdb.com

“Well you say impossible, but all I hear is 'I'm possible.'”

— Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Jason Sudeikis, Ted Lasso, Jason Sudeikis, imdb.com

“And I knew right then and there that I was never gonna let anybody get by me without understanding that they might be hurting inside, you know. 'Cause life, it's hard. It's real hard.”

— Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Jason Sudeikis, Ted Lasso, Jason Sudeikis, imdb.com

“I like to imagine a heaven where animals are in charge.”

— Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Jason Sudeikis, Leslie Higgins, Jeremy Swift, imdb.com

“To try is scary, you know, because you can end up losing a lot. But you have to put your heart out there.”

— Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Jason Sudeikis, Sam Obisanya, Toheeb Jimoh, imdb.com

“We lost. Very badly. But we tried. We gave it everything we had, and for me, that is okay, because what's worse is not to try at all.”

— Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Jason Sudeikis, Sam Obisanya, Toheeb Jimoh, imdb.com

“Ted, the truth will set you free. But first, it'll piss you off.”

— Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Jason Sudeikis, Dr. Sharon Fieldstone, Sarah Niles, imdb.com

“My relationship is the oxygen that gives me life.”

— Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Jason Sudeikis, Leslie Higgins, Jeremy Swift, imdb.com

“Boy, I love meeting people's moms. It's like reading an instruction manual as to why they're nuts.”

— Brett Goldstein, Ted Lasso, Jason Sudeikis, imdb.com

“You are more mysterious than David Blaine reading a Sue Grafton novel in Area 51.”

— Brett Goldstein, Ted Lasso, Jason Sudeikis, imdb.com

“I think a fella should only take as long as the tune 'Easy Lover' by Phil Collins and Philip Bailey to get dressed in the morning.”

— Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Jason Sudeikis, Ted Lasso, Jason Sudeikis, imdb.com

“Fuck, you're amazing. Let's invade France.”

— Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Jason Sudeikis, Keeley Jones, Juno Temple, imdb.com

“I suppose... the best brand is just being yourself.”

— Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Jason Sudeikis, Leslie Higgins, Jeremy Swift, imdb.com

“Gentlemen, believing in rom-communism is all about believing that everything's gonna work out in the end.”

— Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Jason Sudeikis, Ted Lasso, Jason Sudeikis, imdb.com

“Listen, Phoebe, problems, they're like mushrooms, yeah? The longer you leave them in the dark, the bigger they grow.”

— Joe Kelly, Keeley Jones, Juno Temple, imdb.com

“Now listen up you little turd birds!”

— Ashley Nicole Black, Ted Lasso, Jason Sudeikis, imdb.com

“Felt good to be back around the game.”

— Brendan Hunt, Bill Lawrence, Jason Sudeikis, Roy Kent, Brett Goldstein, imdb.com