Hold it up! You're gonna let some quack doctor just knife around down there? You are blessed with a great power, and you should never snip its wings. You should let it soar.
— Daniel J. Goor, Michael Schur, Gina Linetti, Chelsea Peretti, imdb.com
Hold it up! You're gonna let some quack doctor just knife around down there? You are blessed with a great power, and you should never snip its wings. You should let it soar.
— Daniel J. Goor, Michael Schur, Gina Linetti, Chelsea Peretti, imdb.com
Here's a poem dedicated to every guy I've ever been with: ‘Your Penis Is Kinda Nice, Too Bad You're Attached to It!’
This sucks. This sucks a bag of dicks.
— Becky Mann, Audra Sielaff, David Hornsby, Deandra Reynolds, Kaitlin Olson, imdb.com
Yes, I will! That's right, assholes! Take my penis. Take it all!! And tell Shrimply Pibbles that when the galaxy came calling, Jerry Smith from Earth didn't flinch!
— Dan Guterman, Ryan Ridley, Justin Roiland, Dan Harmon, Jerry Smith (voice), Chris Parnell, imdb.com
Shrimply Pibbles: I've dwelt among the humans. Their entire culture is built around their penises. It's funny to say they are small. It's funny to say they are big. I've been at parties where humans held bottles, pencils, thermoses in front of themselves and called out, 'Hey, look at me. I'm Mr. So-…
— Dan Guterman, Ryan Ridley, Justin Roiland, Dan Harmon, Jerry Smith (voice), Chris Parnell, imdb.com
Ambassador: Mr. Smith, Shrimply Pibbles' life can be saved... if we replace his heart with your human penis. Jerry: I see... Wait, what?!
— Dan Guterman, Ryan Ridley, Justin Roiland, Dan Harmon, Jerry Smith (voice), Chris Parnell, imdb.com
None of us'd be here without cum.
Peetniss? Penis?
I hate the penis. Ugly fucking skin stick. Always trying to get in where it doesn't belong, hoping to explode like sticky volcano.
What does a slut say when her daughter asks how to spell ‘penis’? I wish you’d asked me last night, when it was on the tip of my tongue….
You know you’re fucked when you have a penis in your vagina.
When a guy pulls his penis out, he can tell what his partner thinks about his size based on their sighs.
Do you think sending photos of your penis is a good way to get a woman's attention, or is respectful, or even remotely welcome?
I have never been so repulsed by someone mentally and so attracted to them physically at the same time. It's like my brain is facing my penis in a chess game. And I'm letting him win.
I started to look at sex like a fight, and my weapon was my cock.
Did you hear about the guy with 5 penises? His pants fit like a glove.
Never pull hard on the foreskin to separate it.
We may not be used to it the States, but uncircumcised are definitely the norm.
One thing I like is doing the OPPOSITE move to the foreskin that you're doing to the dick. Like, when you're going down on the dick, pull the foreskin up, and when you're going up on the dick, push the foreskin down. If done right it can be great.
The biggest thing to remember, though, is that unlike a cut cock, when dealing with an uncircumcised member you can grip hard and really work the skin.
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