The Flintstones

“Fred Flintstone: [dressed as a nurse, trying to sneak Barney out past the Desk Nurse] You're doing fine, Mr Rubble. We'll take you outside around the grounds and get some fresh air. Desk Nurse: [after they've passed] Wow, what a homely nurse.”

— Tony Benedict, Fred Flintstone, Alan Reed, imdb.com

“Fred Flintstone: Are you the desk nurse? Desk Nurse: No, I'm Lady Godiva and this is a kissing booth. Fred Flintstone: Where's Barney Rubble? I need to see him. Desk Nurse: He's in Room 102. Who are you, fatso, a deceased relative or something?”

— Tony Benedict, Fred Flintstone, Alan Reed, imdb.com

“Wilma Flintstone: Don't tell me you've never married, Greta. You were the most popular girl in school. Greta: Oh I guess my standards were too high. I played hard to get and, well... I just didn't get got.”

— Arthur Phillips, Wilma Flintstone, Jean Van Der Pyl, imdb.com

“Wilma Flintstone: [arguing about money] I work hard around here and I'm willing to do more! If necessary, I'll get a job to help out. Fred Flintstone: Oh, that's a hot one! Wilma Flintstone: What's that supposed to mean? Fred Flintstone: [pointing his finger in her face] You are too smart to leave t…”

— Warren Foster, Fred Flintstone, Alan Reed, imdb.com

“All right. All right. I can't make it as fast as you spend it. I admit it, so let's call off the contest!”

— Warren Foster, Fred Flintstone, Alan Reed, imdb.com

“[dancing with a high society lady] You sure shake a mean leg, toots!”

— Warren Foster, Fireman, Hal Smith, imdb.com

“If you scrub with 'Sudsy-Wudsy', you'll wash away the Mudsy-Mudsies...”

— Warren Foster, Barney Rubble, Mel Blanc, imdb.com

“Hmmm, here's the crook of the month. Fifteen thousand reward for information leading to apprehension of Albert Bonehart, wanted for questioning in disappearance of three former wives. Bonehart's fourth wife was last seen in a little railroad station in a valise, a ladies' hatbox, and an executive's…”

— Larry Markes, Fred Flintstone, Alan Reed, imdb.com

“Make your hobby hubby. Keep your hubby happy. When he's a little chubby, he's a happy pappy. With Rockenschpeel!”

— Warren Foster, Wilma Flintstone, Jean Van Der Pyl, imdb.com

“Fred Flintstone: Oh, boy, how terrible can you get food? Pearl Slaghoople: What's the matter sonny, don't you like the breakfast I cooked for ya? Fred Flintstone: I seem to have lost my appetite. What is this stuff, anyway? Pearl Slaghoople: [gets in his face] Health food, sonny. Just what the docto…”

— Larry Markes, Fred Flintstone, Alan Reed, imdb.com

“He was a midget in the big house, see? And he tried to escape by wiggling through a mouse hole after lights out, but he outsmarted himself, see? Cuz it wasn't a mouse hole, it was a light socket, and somebody turned the lights on.”

— Larry Markes, Fred Flintstone, Alan Reed, imdb.com

“Fred Flintstone: [playing cards] Barney, what would you do if you were holding the queen alone? Barney Rubble: I don't know, Fred, it all depends on what time the king gets home. [laughs]”

— Larry Markes, Fred Flintstone, Alan Reed, imdb.com

“If you're queasy... Sailing on the wave... Just open your mouth... Shout, 'Terra Firma Shave!'”

— Larry Markes, Warren Foster, Barney Rubble, Mel Blanc, imdb.com

“Frantic City! Raaaak! Convention! Raaaak! Doctor is a plumber!”

— Warren Foster, Dizzy Dodo Bird, Mel Blanc, imdb.com

“Wilma Flintstone: It's been weeks since you had a good word for anybody or anything. Fred Flintstone: Oh yeah, what about that thing I said about your mother last week? Wilma Flintstone: My mother? Fred Flintstone: I said, good riddance she lives 50 miles away.”

— Herrbert Finn, Fred Flintstone, Alan Reed, imdb.com

“It's true, folks, the Flintstones are gonna have a baby. And I want everybody the whole wide world to know it! YABBA-DABBA DOO!”

— Warren Foster, Fred Flintstone, Alan Reed, imdb.com

“I love my dear sweet mother-in-law. My mother-in-law is a doll.”

— Warren Foster, Fred Flintstone, Alan Reed, imdb.com

“And another thing. If you don't take that insulting commercial off the air, I'll sue, report you to the FCC, and... and... slap your face!”

— Warren Foster, Wilma Flintstone, Jean Van Der Pyl, imdb.com

“Wilma Flintstone: Fred, can't you get up without making all that noise? Fred Flintstone: It's that pesty gooney bird, he's back again! Why can't he fly back to Capistranorock or wherever else he belongs? What a thing to look forward to all summer!”

— Warren Foster, Fred Flintstone, Alan Reed, imdb.com

“Fred Flintstone: Tell me, boss, I'm on pins and needles! What were you wearing? Mr. Rockhead: [Puts on the bird head of the costume that he, unknown to Fred, exchanged with the costumer] I got it right here. Fred Flintstone: Sure, I talked to you, we were standing at the refreshment bar and I was sa…”

— Warren Foster, Fred Flintstone, Alan Reed, imdb.com