“No, no, I haven't seen that. I mean, why would a Pop-Tart want to live inside a toaster, Rick? I mean, th-that would be like the scariest place for them to live. Y'know what I mean?”Tagged: Pop-Tart, toaster, Fantasy, scary, creepy
“Morty: So what?! Y-Y-You could do things inside! Y-You could play guitar, you could masturbate! Morty Jr.: I don't wanna masturbate! I wanna conquer the planet!”Tagged: masturbate, planet, Guitar, growing-up
“Nobody exists on purpose, nobody belongs anywhere, everybody's gonna die. Come watch TV.”Tagged: TV, Existence, Belonging, Death
“Morty: And also, knock next time, you know? I mean, I'm sitting in here, I'm fourteen! I got a computer in here, you know? Jerry: Oh, I, uh... I think I understa— Morty: You know, you're really playing with fire when you burst in here like that, man. Jerry: I get it. Say no more. Morty: I mean one…”Tagged: masturbation, knock, Fire, Seeing Something, computers
“Bird Person: Morty, do you know what wubba lubba dub dub means? Morty: Oh, that's just Rick's stupid nonsense catchphrase. Bird Person: It's not nonsense at all. In my people's tongue, it means, I am in great pain. Please help me.”Tagged: Catchphrase, Nonsense, Pain, Meaning
“Morty: Can you fly a Black Hawk? Mr. President: Can the pope's **** fit through a donut? Morty: Eh... I'm not sure? Mr. President: Exactly!”Tagged: Pope, Dick Jokes, Donut
“Mr. President, if I've learned one thing today, it's that sometimes you have to not give a fuck!”Tagged: Mr. President, cool, Learning
“I masturbated to an extra curvy piece of driftwood the other day!”Tagged: masturbate, Driftwood, teenager
“You guys, are the fucking worst! Your gods are a lie! Fuck you, fuck nature and fuck trees!”Tagged: Lies, Nature, gods, Trees, Rage
“Well then get your shit together, get it all together and put it in a back pack, all your shit, so it's together. And if you gotta take it some where, take it somewhere, you know, take it to the shit store and sell it, or put it in the shit museum. I don't care what you do, you just gotta get it…”Tagged: Shit, Shit Together, Store, museum, Sassy
“SCREW YOU, RICK! I'LL PURGE YOU TOO, YOU OLD... "RICKETY" PIECE OF CRAP! THIS HAS BEEN A LONG TIME COMING! I'M GONNA RIP YOUR FUCKING GUTS OUT AND SMEAR 'EM ALL OVER YOUR FACE! I AIN'T TAKING NO SH-AAAHH!!”Tagged: Purge, Guts, Violence
“How many of these are just horrible mistakes I made? I mean, maybe I'd stop making so many if I let myself learn from them.”Tagged: Learning, Lessons, Mistakes
“President: Here's the adventure: some kind of alien goo-ga has infested the Kennedy Sex Tunnels. I want it hunted down and taken out. Morty: Kennedy Sex Tunnels? President: Naturally you'll forget you saw them, along with, in order of national embarrassment: the Truman Cocaine Lounge, the McKinley…”Tagged: Presidents, Sex, Secrets, National Embarressment