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Quotes tagged ‘teenager’

(40 total)

But I will fall apart if a teenager talks to me.

Putting your penis anywhere when you're a teenager is fun. Plus, I tried to have sex with a watermelon.

— Josh Thomas, Josh, Josh Thomas, imdb.com

Vandalism like a fucking teenager!

— Hannah Gadsby, Liz Doran, Thomas Ward, Josh Thomas, Alan, David Roberts, imdb.com

Ben: People don't get me. Anna: Oh please, Ben! This, like, emo teenager shit is so fucking tired. You know what, I think the thing is everyone gets you and that's the fucking problem.

— Zoe Lister-Jones, Ben, Adam Pally, imdb.com

Ryan: I used to want to be an architect. Kirsten: And what do you want to be now? Ryan: Seventeen. Kirsten: Me, too.

— Jane Espenson, Kirsten Cohen, Kelly Rowan, imdb.com

When I was a teenager, I was in an iron lung.

— Mindy Kaling, Creed Bratton, Creed Bratton, imdb.com

Well, you're too late. Steve's at the age where he doesn't care about going to a ball game with his dad. All he's interested in is girls. He doesn't want ball games, he just wants to ball dames. Huh? Huh?

— Parker Deay, Jordan Blum, Francine Smith (voice), Wendy Schaal, imdb.com

I masturbated to an extra curvy piece of driftwood the other day!

— Dan Guterman, Justin Roiland, Dan Harmon, Morty Smith (voice), Justin Roiland, imdb.com

I've got an emo streak. It's part of what makes me so rad.

— Alex Rubens, Dan Harmon, Rick Sanchez (voice), Justin Roiland, imdb.com

Summer: You know you're kind of a dick, right? Rick's Computer: My function is to 'keep Summer safe', not 'keep Summer being, like, totally stoked about, like, the general vibe, and stuff'. That's you, that's how you talk.

— Justin Roiland & Dan Harmon, Dan Guterman, Summer Smith (voice), Spencer Grammer, imdb.com

All I have are pictures are of me and my friends from school. What? What teenage girl has pictures of her family? It's not like we're Mormon or dying

— Mike McMahan, Justin Roiland, Dan Harmon, Summer Smith (voice), Spencer Grammer, imdb.com

Dave: You look like a fuckin' teenager! Abby: I feel like an old woman.

— Brett Johnson, Ann Biderman, imdb.com

Whether to kill yourself or not is one of the most important decisions a teenager can make.

— Daniel Waters, Pauline Fleming, Penelope Milford, amazon.com

What is the difference between a driveway and a teenage girl? Roy Moore pulls out of the driveway.

— ShiningConcepts, reddit.com

As a teenager, I didn’t want to be me; I wanted to be many different people. Maybe I realized that they all lived inside me and that if I managed to connect with them, they would become aspects of me.

— Marion Cotillard, vogue.com

I'm seventeen and I'm crazy. My uncle says the two always go together. When people ask your age, he said, always say seventeen and insane.

— Ray Bradbury, amazon.com

Josh: 'Hey James Bond, In America we drive on the right side of the road!' Cher: 'I am! You try driving in platforms.'

— Cher, Josh, amazon.com

Heather: 'It’s just like Hamlet said, ‘To thine own self be true.’' Cher: 'Hamlet didn’t say that.' Heather: 'I think I remember Hamlet accurately.' Cher: 'Well, I remember Mel Gibson accurately, and he didn’t say that. That Polonius guy did.'

— Cher, Heather, amazon.com

Dionne: 'Dude, what’s wrong. You suffering from buyers remorse or something?' Cher: 'God, no! Nothing like that.'

— Cher, Dionne, amazon.com

Isn’t my house classic? The columns date all the way back to 1972.

— Cher, amazon.com

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