“So you can cook your own damned turkey, wrap your own damned presents - and while you're at it, you can all ride a one-horse open sleigh to Hell!”— Danny Smith, Lois Griffin (voice), Alex Borstein, imdb.com
“It's called 'Fortress of Solitude.' Not 'Fortress of Come on In.'”— Ali Waller, John Unholz, Robert Maitia, Brett Cawley, Steve Smith (voice), Scott Grimes, imdb.com
“No, no, no. No. No, don't look at me like you're going to be fucking me. Okay? Because I'm not a fuckable person.”— Jonathan Shapiro, David E Kelley, Patty Solis-Papagian, Nina Arianda, imdb.com
“I am going to smack everyone into tiny...little...pieces!”— Glenn Howerton, Charlie Day, Rob McElhenney, Charlie Kelly, Charlie Day, imdb.com
“I always look annoyed. Yeah, when you look annoyed all the time, people think that you're busy.”— Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com
“I cannot stand small talk, because I feel like there’s an elephant standing in the room shitting all over everything and nobody is saying anything. I’m just dying to say, ‘Hey, do you ever feel like jumping off a bridge?’ or ‘Do you feel an emptiness inside your chest at night that is going to swall…”— Paul Gilmartin, goodreads.com
“I find that my days are far more smooth and pleasant when I don’t give someone the leverage to annoy or stress me. Just smile, giggle to yourself, or wave.”— Cathy Burnham Martin, amazon.com
“You're generally irritable for no reason. Being sexually frustrated isn’t a bad thing, but it can start to take on a life of its own if it goes too far. Without a release, things get a little bit crazy. Sometimes you don’t even realize it at all and blame it on stress or other life frustrations that…”— Andrea Wesley, thebolde.com
“The very things about you that he used to find cute, he now finds irritating.”— Amy Keyishian, more.com
“I want to roll my eyes right now but the doctor said if I keep doing it, my ocular muscles might spasm and eject my eyeballs.”— Liz Lemon, amazon.com
“My mother's psychologist says I have an overactive anger switch, but people just keep pissing me off.”— Meg Cabot, amazon.com