“Steve: I can't believe I'm gonna die a virgin. Francine: Aw, sweetie, there was a 70-80% chance of that happening, anyway.”Tagged: virgin, Die A virgin, Sex, Diss
“I may be blonde with great cans, but I'm pretty smart when I've had my eight hours.”Tagged: blonde, breasts, Smart, Sleep, Eight Hours
“Francine: Steve, your father got hurt in a very tender place. He's probably frustrated he can't go to work, or mow the lawn, or clean the gutters. Boy, it's been a while since he's cleaned the gutters. Steve: Hey, maybe until Dad get better, I can clean the gutters. Francine: That's creepy, honey.”Tagged: hurt, Frustrated, Mow The Lawn, Clean the gutters, Sex
“Francine: You want your money, you unsupportive jerk? Fine! Here's your $5,000 back. Stan: You made all this in one day? Francine: That's right, I did. Through hard work and giving people incorrect change.”Tagged: Money, Cash, Jerk, Unsupportive, Hard Work
“Doctor says I have a big, spongy cervix. Oh, listen to me bragging about my vagina. It's last week's PTA meeting all over again.”Tagged: Cervix, bragging, Vagina, PTA, doctor
“You know why Chinese couples can't have their own Caucasian babies? Because two Wongs don't make a white.”Tagged: Jokes, Chinease, Couples, babies, Punny
“Well, you're too late. Steve's at the age where he doesn't care about going to a ball game with his dad. All he's interested in is girls. He doesn't want ball games, he just wants to ball dames. Huh? Huh?”Tagged: teenager, Doesn't care, Girls, Ball Games, Punny
“I wanted to be the mother of the first boy to whack it on the moon.”Tagged: mother, Moon, Mastrubation, ambitions
“Any man who ever did anything great was just trying to show up some piece of ass who didn't give him any.”Tagged: Great, Success, Point to prove, Sex, Show Up
“A real New York hotel! How many Wall Street bankers have had their first prostitute here?”Tagged: New York, Wall Street, Bankers, Sex, hotels
“Stan, we can't have a grown woman acting like a child in our house. This ain't no Disney Channel.”Tagged: Child, grown woman, Disney Channel, Acting