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Tommy Swerdlow

54 quotesFilm Actor · United States Of America · Male

Tommy Swerdlow (born 1962) is an American actor and screenwriter. He has appeared in such films as Howard the Duck (1986) and Spaceballs (1987) and co-wrote the screenplays of Cool Runnings (1993), Little Giants (1994) and Snow Dogs (2002). Swerdlow made his directorial debut with the 2017 feature A Thousand Junkies. He has also written a biopic about the life of Matisyahu titled King Without a Crown. 2Filmography 3Actor The Wild Life (1984) - Dork Real Genius (1985) - Bodie Howard the Duck (1986) - Ginger Moss Spaceballs (1987) - Troop Leader Hamburger Hill (1987) - Pv

All bobsledding (5)jamaica (4)olympics (4)bobsled (3)Swiss (3)Jamaican (3)butt (3)Embarrassment (2)Calgary (2)Cheating (2)Fart (2)Football (2)cold (2)tryouts (1)Haile selassie (1)

From “Little Giants”

Briggs: Ready! Set! Go! [Kevin takes off in a charging sprint toward a couch cushion, held by Karen] Karen O’Shea: Kevin! Aah! [Karen lets go of the cushion and Kevin goes flying out the window, landing crotch-first on a tree limb] Kevin O’Shea: Oh! Doctor! [in pain, he tilts and falls into their…

Slapstick Ow! My Balls

Here’s a kiss for Murphey. And for Patterson and Briggs, too. [Farts loudly]

kiss Fart Gross

Kevin O’Shea: Peanut butter and jelly sandwich? Are you nuts? Rudy Zolteck: It’s still good! Kevin O’Shea: You’ll never get anywhere treating your helmet like a lunchbox, son? What is that? Butz: Cheeto’s. Kevin O’Shea: Crunchy or puffed? Butz: Puffed. Kevin O’Shea: Wimp! [Butz confiscates the food…

Cheeto's Peanut Butter wimp

Butz: [spying on the Giants] This is incredible! They got the guards in the backfield! The center’s on the right! And the quarterback isn’t even there! Kevin O’Shea: They’re just standing around, Butz. Butz: Oh, yeah.

Football quarterback backfield

Becky O’Shea: [quietly doing a cheer] Give me a J. Give me a U. Give me a… Danny O’Shea: Is that lipstick? Becky O’Shea: No. It’s a cherry Tootsie Pop.

Tootsie Pop

Danny O’Shea: I don’t know, but I’ve been told. Little Giants: Butz’s butt is green with mold. Danny O’Shea: You say thank you I say please. Little Giants: Kevin sits down when he pees.

butt mold Pee Rhyme

Danny O’Shea: Hey, I got an idea. How about we go put some mud tires on the go cart? Becky O’Shea: Nah. I don’t want to. Danny O’Shea: Alright, forget the tires. How about we go camping in the woods! Make moose sounds? Becky O’Shea: Nah. Danny O’Shea: All right, forget the moose sounds.

Tires Woods Moose Sounds Come-ons Flirting

Danny O’Shea: [Kevin and Danny are racing to claim the new player] This whole town may love you, but I’m the only one who knows how truly sick you are! Kevin O’Shea: I treated you like a prince! Danny O’Shea: You ignored me! Kevin O’Shea: I took you to see the Cleveland Indians! Danny O’Shea: You…

Sick Cleveland Indians Ignored Abandoned

Danny O’Shea: [Recruiting Timmy] Do you play football? Timmy Moore: No. Danny O’Shea: Do you like football? Timmy Moore: No. Danny O’Shea: Do you want to play football? Timmy Moore: No. Danny O’Shea: Great, you can be on our team.

Football Aloof

Danny O’Shea: [disguising his voice as a little old lady] State police? Oh, thank God! My name is Thelma Mae Rogers, I’m 86 years old, I live in Urbania. There are two men down the bridge from the Shell station spying on some kids! [passes the phone to Timmy, who starts to ‘cry’] I just don’t think…

State Police Shell Station Underwear high five

[Danny is introducing the Little Giants to their parents] Danny O’Shea: Rudy Zoleteck, your friendly neighborhood gas man! Mr. Zolteck: Gas man? I don’t get it. Mrs. Zolteck: Think about it.

friendly Neighborhood gas man

[receiving their uniforms] Tad: Death shrouds. [flips one around] Danny O’Shea: They’ve got your names on the back. Jake Berman: So the guys at the morgue can identify the bodies. Mike Hammersmith: What’s that cheerleader doing with a helmet on? Kevin O’Shea: That’s no cheerleader, that’s my niece…

Morgue helmet Cheerleader Pissed

From “Puss in Boots”

Was the legend so big there was no room for anyone else.

Legend Alone Sad

Silly guards, dogpiles don’t work on cats.

Silly Dogpile play on words Arrest

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