ALF

“ALF: Why don't you ring up Ann-Margret and get her over here? Aaron King: Sure... I'll just head on over to Graceland and pick up my Rolodex.”

— Al Jean, ALF (voice), Paul Fusco, imdb.com

“Willie Tanner: You've convinced me ALF, that we're living two doors down the street from Elvis Presley and Raquel is Janis Joplin and Trevor is Buddy Holly. ALF: That'll be the day!”

— Al Jean, Willie Tanner, Max Wright, imdb.com

“Aaron King: Can I pet you? ALF: Only above the waist.”

— Al Jean, ALF (voice), Paul Fusco, imdb.com

“ALF: ELVIS HAS LEFT THE BUILDING! Willie Tanner: That was not Elvis Presley. ALF: Are you kidding?, he was on that sandwich like red beans on rice. Lynn Tanner: He didn't seem like Elvis to me either. ALF: Elvis was a brilliant actor. He could play anything from a singing race car driver to a singin…”

— Al Jean, ALF (voice), Paul Fusco, imdb.com

“Aaron King: What do you aliens do all day? Look for dead celebrities? ALF: I'm so tired of that stereotype.”

— Al Jean, ALF (voice), Paul Fusco, imdb.com

“Willie Tanner: ALF! Flakey Pete: [walks into the kitchen] Oh. Hi Willie. Willie Tanner: Where is he? Flakey Pete: Who? Your little alien guy? Willie Tanner: If anything... anything has happened to him, you're gonna be... ALF: Hey. Willie. Willie Tanner: ALF! ALF: Willie! Willie Tanner: ALF! ALF: Wil…”

— Tom Patchett, Stephen Hollander, ALF (voice), Paul Fusco, imdb.com

“Raquel Ochmonek: Mark my words, that man who lived next door to us was Buddy Holly. ALF: [pops open the shutters in the kitchen after Raquel leaves] Boy, is she gullible! Everybody knows Buddy Holly runs a bait and tackle shop in Phoenix.”

— Al Jean, Raquel Ochmonek, Liz Sheridan, imdb.com

“ALF: Ignorance is no excuse. Kate Tanner: Ignorance is your excuse all the time! ALF: I don't know what you are talking about.”

— Scott Spencer Gordon, ALF (voice), Paul Fusco, imdb.com

“Either he's Elvis, or Priscilla had a heck of a lawn sale.”

— Al Jean, ALF (voice), Paul Fusco, imdb.com

“Why are you so intent on moving out of a house that you like, in order for you to continue to do a job you don't like?”

— Alicia Marie Schudt, ALF (voice), Paul Fusco, imdb.com

“Kate Tanner: [after ALF claims that according to a magazine article, he is a thrill-seeker] This from the same person who watched the movie Aliens from under the couch? ALF: Hey, I thought I owed one of those guys money.”

— Bob Bendetson, ALF (voice), Paul Fusco, imdb.com

“Why must you needlessly complicate everything?”

— Bob Bendetson, ALF (voice), Paul Fusco, imdb.com

“Let's go to dinner. Don't worry—tab's on me. Though I'm not paying for Brian's invisible friend.”

— Paul Fusco, Uncle Albert, Elisha Cook Jr, imdb.com

“Let me just try to understand, ALF. The operative word in People Log is 'people'... one of which you are... not... one. That's cruel. Not to mention poorly constructed from a grammatical standpoint.”

— Lisa A. Bannick, Willie Tanner, Max Wright, imdb.com

“There are many things in this universe you're not meant to understand. Now, that doesn't mean they're not real. I'm real, and whether other people believe you or not, you know I'm real.”

— Steve Pepoon, ALF (voice), Paul Fusco, imdb.com

“I wish you would stop calling me little buddy; I’m in my 40s for, crying out loud.”

— Scott Spencer Gordon, Gilligan, Bob Denver, imdb.com

“ALF, if you let us get some sleep I promise you will get back to this Gilligan's Island business first thing in the morning. and maybe just maybe we will build you a little lagoon all of your own.”

— Scott Spencer Gordon, Willie Tanner, Max Wright, imdb.com

“Are you kidding? why we'd be out of here in a minute if smarty pants could get off this rock.”

— Scott Spencer Gordon, Skipper Jonas Grumby, Alan Hale Jr., imdb.com

“Willie: What are you playing? ALF: [at a video game] Space Invaders. Willie: What do they do? Live in your garage, eat all your food, dig up your back yard? ALF: You're in a mood... Willie: Yes, I am! Because I found my good hoe, in THIS condition! [holds up a pole with a bit of mangled scrap iron o…”

— Donald Todd, ALF (voice), Paul Fusco, imdb.com

“Aren't you guys happy? You are here on Gilligan’s island?”

— Scott Spencer Gordon, ALF (voice), Paul Fusco, imdb.com