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Brad Falchuk

126 quotesDirector · United States Of America · Male

Brad Falchuk (born 1971) is an American television writer, director, and producer. He is best known for co-creating with Ryan Murphy the comedy-drama television series Glee and the horror-drama anthology series American Horror Story and Scream Queens. He was also a writer and executive producer for the television series Nip/Tuck. 2Early life Falchuk was born in Newton, Massachusetts. His mother is Nancy Falchuk, the national president of the American Jewish women's organization Hadassah (as of 2007). He has an older brother, Evan (b. 1969). Falchuk attended Beaver Country Day School. In high school, he tried to stand out from his classmates by wearing a tie to school each day and declaring himself a Republican. He said, "I was always trying to look smart because I didn't feel smart'; he actually suffered from undiagnosed dyslexi

All Sex (8)Life (7)Love (6)Feelings (6)emotions (3)upset (3)insults (3)Sassy (3)World (3)Loss (2)Hot (2)train (2)Good Person (2)Politics (2)Win (2)

From “Pilot”

The world is a filthy place. It's a filthy goddamn horror show. There's just so much pain, y'know?

Filthy Horror Show Pain

You might think that all of the boys in school would want to tap this, but my MySpace schedule keeps me way too busy to date.

MySpace Dating

I am not homophobic. In fact, I have two gay dads. See, I was born out of love. My two dads screened potential surrogates based on beauty and IQ. Then they mixed their sperm together and used a turkey baster. To this day we don't know which one is my real dad, which I think is pretty amazing.

Homophobia beauty IQ Artificial Insemination

Sue Sylvester: High school is a caste system. Kids fall into certain slots. Your jocks and your popular kids up in the penthouse. The invisibles and the kids playing live-action out in the forest: bottom floor. Will Schuester: And...where do the Glee kids lie? Sue Sylvester: Sub-basement.

Glee high school Caste System

Puck: What the hell, dude? I can't believe you're helping out this loser! Finn Hudson: Don't you get it, man? We're all losers! Everyone in this school! Hell, everyone in this town! Out of all the kids who graduate, maybe half will go to college, and two will leave the state to do it! I'm not afraid…

Loser Acceptance high school

I won my first dance competition when I was three months old.

infants dance competition

Finn Hudson: Look, I owe you guys an apology. I never should have quit. I don't want to be the guy that just drives around throwing eggs at people! Rachel Berry: That was you? Kurt Hummel: You and your friends threw pee balloons at me. Finn Hudson: I know. Kurt Hummel: You nailed all my lawn…

Pranks Apologies

Nowadays being anonymous is worse than being poor. Fame is the most important thing in our culture now. And if there is one thing I’ve learned it is that no one is just going to hand it to you.

anonymous poor Social Media

From “Home Invasion”

Larry Harvey: I'm trying very hard not to judge you. Dr. Ben Harmon: Me? You murdered your entire family. Larry Harvey: Yes. But I was never unfaithful.

Judgment Murder Unfaithful

Is there anything more wonderful than the promise of a new child...or more heartbreaking when that promise is broken?

New Child Heartbreaking Broken Promises

From “Open House”

No matter how gruesome or horrible the murder, you can always find someone who'll buy the house.

Gruesome horrible Murder Homeowners

From “I Am Anne Frank, Pt. 2”

Men are never gonna accept a woman taking charge, especially not a woman as strong as you are.

Bossy Empowered Strong Women

From “Bitchcraft”

It's too hot. My frickin' vagina's sweating.

Heat Sweat

From “Monsters Among Us”

I'll tell you who the monsters are! The people outside this tent! In your town, in all these little towns. Housewives pinched with bitterness, stupefied with boredom as they doze off in front of their laundry detergent commercials, and dream of strange, erotic pleasures. They have no souls. My…

monsters Heroic Boredom Depraved oddity

Dear Diary, my soul plumbs new depths of despair. I long for the quiet of the farm. The warmth of my bed, the smell of flowers outside my window. I'm surrounded by a cesspool of activity. No words can do justice to the depravity that permeates the grounds.

Diary Soul Smell of Flowers Depravity

From “Charles”

I'm an old-school, OG feminist. And do you know who my favorite politician of all time is? Donald J. Trump. For thousands of years, mankind has built civilization with a single intention: to keep woman contained. Face down, ass up. Compliant. Donald Trump cannot tie his dick-tripping ties correctly,…

Old School OG Feminist Donald Trump Catcalls

From “Showmance”

My father always said you'd become a man when you bought your first house. I'm not sure what he meant, though, because he burned ours down during a drunken fight with mom.

homeownership Arson

Have you ever liked someone so much you just wanna lock yourself in your room, turn on sad music and cry?

crushes Sad cry Sad music

People think you're gay now, Finn. And do you know what that makes me? Your big, gay beard!

gay beard

From “Preggers”

Your wife is going to be pushing a watermelon out of her boy-howdy in five months! She doesn't need nice!

Pregnancy Boy Howdy Watermelon

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