“You know, it's weird. You're my age, but wise. You're like my mum... in a little man's body. Like a little mum man. No offense.”Tagged: Weird, wise, Old, Knowledgeable
“When we're having sex, I feel like I've never seen a vagina before. But I have seen one, because I've got one, and I've looked at it a lot.”Tagged: Sex, Vagina, lost
“Otis Milburn: I might have a mild to moderate crush on Maeve. Eric Effoing: Yeah, no shit. What gave it away? Otis Milburn: She, uh... she touched my eyebrows, and now I have an erection.”Tagged: Crush, erection, Eyebrows, Love
“Do you know how long I've been called Cock Biter? Four years. People I've never met call me Cock Biter to my face. I bit Simon Furthassle's scrote. I had sex with four guys at the same time. I fucked my second cousin. I'll give you a hand job for a fiver if you like. Do you know how it started?…”Tagged: Rumors, upset, fake
“Ruby: It's my vagina! Maeve Wiley: What? Ruby: It's mine, okay? And I need your help. You and that weird sex kid who looks like a Victorian ghost.”Tagged: help, Victorian, Ghost, Diss, Sassy
“Only you could turn the topic of dreams into existential angst.”Tagged: Dreams, Topic , Angst, Existential, Writing
“Maeve Wiley: Pessimists outlive optimists. Otis Milburn: We're in for the long haul then.”Tagged: Pessemistic , Optimism, Life
“I don't know what I want. No one has every asked me that before.”Tagged: Preference, likes, Dislike, Wants
“Maeve Wiley: How did you know it was mine? Otis Milburn: Well, Adam thought 'As You Like It' was a song by Jay-Z. And only you could turn the topic of dreams into existential angst”Tagged: Jay-Z, Dreams, Angst
“We've been holding hands for 45 minutes. I know how to hold hands. I'm here to fornicate.”Tagged: Holding Hands, Fornicate, Sex
“Intercourse can be wonderful, but it can also cause tremendous pain. And if you're not careful, sex can destroy lives.”Tagged: Sex, Pain, Destressing
“Otis Milburn: What I'm saying is, before you talk to Steve, you... you should probably figure out, you know, what works for you... and your body. Aimee Gibbs: So you're prescribing a wank? Otis Milburn: ...Yeah.”Tagged: Prescription, Body, Sex
“Aimee Gibbs: Steve says his 'thing' is girls properly enjoying sex. He says he can tell I'm being fake. Otis Milburn: Well, are you? Aimee Gibbs: Yeah. I'm always fake.”Tagged: fake, orgasm, Enjoyment, Pleasure
“I've been wanking all night. I ate four packets of crumpets, and I think my clit might drop off.”Tagged: Sex, masturbation, Crumpets
“What is it with boys? It's like you all suddenly woke up with boundaries.”Tagged: boys, Boundries , Rules
“Lily Iglehart: To be clear, I don't want to have sex with you specifically. Just a human man with a penis. Otis Milburn: That's... great for my self-esteem.”Tagged: Sex, human, Self-Esteem