Blue Mountain State

“I will have my friend, Larry, here, stick his fingers so far up your ass your breathe will smell like Larry's fingers.”

— Drew Hancock, Thad Castle, Alan Ritchson, imdb.com

“I never stick my finger up nobody's ass but my own...and a flight attendant once, but that was because of turbulence.”

— Chris Romano, Eric Falconer, Radon Randell, Page Kennedy, imdb.com

“I'm gonna sack you so hard your dick's gonna go into your throat and your gonna choke on your dick and die!”

— Chris Romano, Eric Falconer, Thad Castle, Alan Ritchson, imdb.com

“You never know, some guys might just get off fingering other guys' asses.”

— Chris Romano, Eric Falconer, Larry Summers, Omari Newton, imdb.com

“Look, man, I'm just here to make my mark, let everybody in this school know that I'm the shit and they 'bout to smell it!”

— Chris Romano, Eric Falconer, Radon Randell, Page Kennedy, imdb.com

“Which one of you assholes stuck his finger in my asshole?”

— Chris Romano, Eric Falconer, Thad Castle, Alan Ritchson, imdb.com

“Mary Jo Cacciatore: I've changed a lot, Alex. I used to not have boobs, but now...I have them. Alex Moran: Yes, I'm looking right at them.”

— Chris Romano, Eric Falconer, Mary Jo Cacciatore, Frankie Shaw, imdb.com

“Thad Castle: Okay, I'm sure a lot of you are freaking out about the drug test; well, take a chill pill; they don't test for those. Alex Moran: Wait, I'm not freaking out. I mean, it's just beer and weed for me, so uh, I just need a whole lot of water and tartar sauce. Thad Castle: Tartar sauce? Harm…”

— Drew Hancock, J.D. Ryznar, Harmon Tedesco, James Cade, imdb.com

“I used to masturbate exclusively with motor oil….Yeah, I was that guy.”

— Eric Falconer, Chris Romano, Harmon Tedesco, James Cade, imdb.com

“That is how I find out raw eggs work as well as any sexual lubricant, men. [shrugging with a smug grin] It was a happy accident.”

— Drew Hancock, J.D. Ryznar, Chester Tam, Harmon Tedesco, James Cade, imdb.com

“I sleep in there, party in there, I do whatever in there, baby. It's my hyperbolic chamber, man. Know what I'm saying? It gets your platelet levels going, and your hemoglobins and your DNA and shit. TO got one, man!”

— Chris Romano, Eric Falconer, Radon Randell, Page Kennedy, imdb.com

“I just had a brainstorm. What if we kill the professor? If your teacher dies, they have to give you all 'A's. It's the law.”

— Drew Hancock, J.D. Ryznar, Chester Tam, Harmon Tedesco, James Cade, imdb.com

“Craig Shilo: Harmon! Seriously? You couldn't wait three days? Harmon Tedesco: It's cleaner. It's just how I prefer to take it. Alex Moran: Does it do anything? Harmon Tedesco: I feel pretty lightheaded right now, yeah.”

— Drew Hancock, J.D. Ryznar, Harmon Tedesco, James Cade, imdb.com

“I did some uppers and then I did some downers. Annnnnnd then I chased the dragon. Not proud of that.”

— Drew Hancock, J.D. Ryznar, Harmon Tedesco, James Cade, imdb.com

“Alex Moran: Police. Thad Castle: What? Someone called the police! Shit! Someone called the police! Larry, police! Larry: POLICE!”

— J.D. Ryznar, Drew Hancock, Chester Tam, Alex Moran, Darin Brooks, imdb.com

“Thad Castle: Come on, guys! We're going to play football! No teams! Harmon Tedesco: Uh, I'm pretty sure you need two teams to play football, fellas, know what I'm sayin'?”

— Drew Hancock, J.D. Ryznar, Chester Tam, Thad Castle, Alan Ritchson, imdb.com

“Doctor: Are you at least having sex with these women? Sammy Cacciatore: No.”

— Drew Hancock, J.D. Ryznar, Chester Tam, Sammy Cacciatore, Chris Romano, imdb.com

“Coach Jon Jon: I don't like it when you call my house in the middle of the night... tell my wife to wake me up... just so we can talk about stuff that we can talk about tomorrow. Coach Marty Daniels: I don't do that.”

— Drew Hancock, J.D. Ryznar, Chester Tam, imdb.com

“Thad Castle: Yes! Upper class-men win another! Alex Moran: You didn't even measure that one. Thad Castle: I measured with my dick!”

— Drew Hancock, J.D. Ryznar, Chester Tam, imdb.com

“Thad Castle: The teacher's become the master. Harmon Tedesco: What? Thad Castle: I said the teacher's become the blaster. Harmon Tedesco: I literally have no idea what you're trying to say me right now, man.”

— Drew Hancock, J.D. Ryznar, Chester Tam, Thad Castle, Alan Ritchson, imdb.com