Season 4

“I am going to smack everyone into tiny...little...pieces!”

— Glenn Howerton, Charlie Day, Rob McElhenney, Charlie Kelly, Charlie Day, imdb.com

“Frank: You gotta pay the troll toll to get into this boy's hole. You gotta pay the troll toll to get in. You want this baby boy's hole, you gotta pay the troll toll. Charlie: Stop, stop, stop. All right not bad, good rhythm, love the enthusiasm. I feel like you're saying 'boy's hole', and it's clear…”

— Glenn Howerton, Rob McElhenney, Charlie Kelly, Charlie Day, imdb.com

“Keep singing, bitch! You're not gonna have a face by the time I'm through with you!”

— Glenn Howerton, Rob McElhenney, Charlie Kelly, Charlie Day, imdb.com

“I was that little boy, that little baby boy was me! I once was a boy, but now I'm a man! I fought the Nightman, lived as Dayman, now I'm here to ask for your hand, so if you are too merry m'am will you marry me? Will you come on stage and join me in this thing called matrimony? Please say yes and do…”

— Glenn Howerton, Charlie Day, Rob McElhenney, Charlie Kelly, Charlie Day, imdb.com

“Dennis: You know what I'm concerned about? I don't want to get too bulky. I want to stay nice and lean and tight. I want to get that Jesus on the cross look. Dee: I see what you're saying. I think that crucifixion must have been really good for your core. Dennis: Oh absolutely. Jesus had like the be…”

— Scott Marder, Rob Rosell, Dennis Reynolds, Glenn Howerton, imdb.com

“I stole a bunch of guns! I'm testing them out, Charles! This revolution is gonna make us a fortune!”

— Glenn Howerton, Rob McElhenney, David Hornsby, Frank Reynolds, Danny DeVito, imdb.com

“See you, Coach Dick and Balls.”

— Scott Marder, Rob Rosell, Deandra Reynolds, Kaitlin Olson, imdb.com

“You wanna talk about stress? You wanna talk about stress?! Okay! I've stumbled onto a major company conspiracy, Mac--how 'bout that for stress?”

— Scott Marder, Rob Rosell, Charlie Kelly, Charlie Day, imdb.com

“The outcast. The slut. The bitch. The whore. The lonely, sad, slutty, bitchy whore. You sat on the sideline while these four titans battled it out. You were jealous that a few pieces of poop got more attention than you.”

— Rob McElhenney, Scott Marder, Rob Rosell, Artemis, Artemis Pebdani, imdb.com

“Im gonna take my bra off, blast my nips.”

— Rob McElhenney, Scott Marder, Rob Rosell, Artemis, Artemis Pebdani, imdb.com

“Surprise, bitches! We're alive and it's blowing your minds right now!”

— Glenn Howerton, Charlie Day, Rob McElhenney, Deandra Reynolds, Kaitlin Olson, imdb.com

“Of course I'm gonna explode. You think I'm not gonna explode?”

— Glenn Howerton, Charlie Day, Rob McElhenney, Charlie Kelly, Charlie Day, imdb.com

“Dennis, if I was looking for safe I wouldn't be sticking my dick through a wall.”

— Glenn Howerton, Charlie Day, Rob McElhenney, Frank Reynolds, Danny DeVito, imdb.com

“Dennis: Lay it on us, bud. Mac: It involves us pulling up our bootstraps, oiling up a couple of asses, and doing a little plowing of our own. Not gay sex.”

— Charlie Day, Sonny Lee, Patrick Walsh, Mac, Rob McElhenney, imdb.com

“Dennis: No, I'm not going to talk in a southern accent. It's bad enough that you wore this stupid 'disguise.' Charlie: But we're oil men! We would have southern accents. Dennis: Yeah, but we don't need bolo ties and stupid hats.”

— Charlie Day, Sonny Lee, Patrick Walsh, Dennis Reynolds, Glenn Howerton, imdb.com

“Yeah! Yeah, that's the classic setup. You know this, no? Look, every great crew in history has followed that basic dynamic, right? Looks, brains, wildcard. Think about it! The A-team did it. Scooby Doo did it. The Ghostbusters did it!”

— Charlie Day, Sonny Lee, Patrick Walsh, Mac, Rob McElhenney, imdb.com

“Frank: Hey! I killed a deer, I should get to eat it. That's the natural order. Mac: Wait, you shot a deer? Frank: That's right! A ten point buck!”

— Charlie Day, Jordan Young, Elijah Aron, Frank Reynolds, Danny DeVito, imdb.com

“Cannibalism? Racism? Dude, that's not for us...those decisions are better left to the suits in Washington. We're just here to eat some dude!”

— Charlie Day, Jordan Young, Elijah Aron, Charlie Kelly, Charlie Day, imdb.com