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Marjorie Gross

17 quotesTelevision Producer · Born Apr 18, 1956 · Died Jun 7, 1996 · Canada · Female

Marjorie Gross (April 18, 1956 – June 7, 1996) was a television writer and producer. She wrote for such shows as Newhart, The Larry Sanders Show, Square Pegs, Get A Life, and Seinfeld. 2Biography She wrote four episodes of Seinfeld: "The Fusilli Jerry", "The Understudy", "The Shower Head", and "The Secretary". She was the first cousin of Canadian comedian and writer Spencer Rice. 3Death During her battle with ovarian cancer early in 1996 she wrote an article, "Cancer Becomes Me," for The New Yorker. She tried to find humor in the situation by joking that she wanted to hold on until November 1996, so that she would not have to risk being re-incarnated as Madonna's child (as Madonna was pregnant). Gross died in June 1996 at age 40. Seinfeld's eighth-season premiere, "The Foundation", was dedicated in her memor

All Attraction (2)Understudies (2)Sex (2)J. Peterman (1)Fashion (1)Threats (1)Bathing (1)Job Interviews (1)broadway (1)Feet (1)Stanley Kowalski (1)Secretariat (1)Animal Rights (1)Out There (1)Addiction (1)

From “The Secretary”

Sure, I like a cupcake every now and then, like everybody else. You know I like it when they have a little cream on the inside, it's a surprise. That's good, plus the chocolate ones are good, too. Sometimes I just can’t even make up my mind. A lot of times I’ll mix the two together, make a vanilla…

Cupcakes Pastries chocolate Vanilla

You're luscious. You're ravishing. I would give up red meat just to get a glimpse of you in a bra. I’m terribly sorry.

Attraction Irony Job Interviews

I don't even know what, what is supposed to be attractive about fur? Why does a man want to see a woman in a fur? Men want women to shave their legs, shave their armpits, pluck their eyebrows and then before we go out, we dress them up like a bear.

fur Animal Rights

From “The Fusilli Jerry”

He stopped short? That's my move. I'm gonna kill him!

Sex Threats Sexual Moves

Now, the ending is kind of an option. I use the swirl. I like the swirl. I'm comfortable with the swirl. I feel the swirl is a great capper. He uses the pinch, which I find a little presumptuous.

Sex The Move David Puddy

Well, all those mechanics do is work all day with their hands and their big, muscular arms on machines, and then they come home dripping with animal sexuality like Stanley Kowalski. What a huge turnoff that is.

Mechanics Attraction Manual Labor muscles Stanley Kowalski

Have you ever met a proctologist? Well, they usually have a very good sense of humor. You meet a proctologist at a party, don't walk away. Plant yourself there, because you will hear the funniest stories you've ever heard. See, no one wants to admit to them that they stuck something up there. Never!…

Proctologists Rectal Foreign Objects parties

You're not out there! You can't be, because I am out there. And if I see you out there, there's not enough voltage in this world to electroshock me back into coherence!

Dating Out There Electroshock Therapy

From “The Understudy”

Then in the distance I heard the bulls. I began running as fast as I could. Fortunately, I was wearing my Italian Captoe Oxfords. Sophisticated yet different; nothing to make a huge fuss about. Rich dark brown calfskin leather. Matching leather vent. Men's whole and half sizes 7 through 13. Price:…

J. Peterman Fashion Oxfords Leather Men's Shoes

Oh, understudies are a very shifty bunch. The substitute teachers of the theater world.

Understudies Substitute Teachers

So, my dear, you think you can get to Broadway. Well, let me tell you something. Broadway has no room for people like you. Not the Broadway I know. My Broadway takes people like you and eats them up and spits them out.

broadway Understudies Show Business

No one is touching my feet. Between you and me, Elaine, I think I've got a foot odor problem.

Feet Podiatry Pedicures Foot Odor

From “The Shower Head”

Swinging? What are you, out of your mind? Look at you, you're disgusting. You're bald, you're paunchy, all kinds of sounds are emanating from your body twenty-four hours a day. If there's a woman that can take your presence for more than ten consecutive seconds, you should hang on to her like grim…

Swinging Aging Mortality Grim Death Grim Reaper

It's disgusting. I'm sitting there in a tepid pool of my own filth. All kinds of microscopic parasites and organisms having sex all around me.

baths Bathing Germophobia Parasites Microorganisms

I know what you're going through. I too once fell under the spell of opium. It was 1979. I was travelling the Yangtze in search of a Mongolian horsehair vest. I had got to the market after sundown. All of the clothing traders had gone, but a different sort of trader still lurked about. ‘Just a…

Opium Addiction Yangtze River 1979

Yeah, I got some family backstage. Course my family's nuts; they're crazy. Yep. My uncle Leo. I had lunch with him the other day, he's one of these guys that anything goes wrong in life, he blames it on anti-Semitism. You know what I mean, the spaghetti's not al dente? Cook's an anti-Semite. Loses a…

Anti-Semitism spaghetti Secretariat Crazy Family Members Jay Leno

All right. Anyway, the point I was making before Goebbels made your hamburger is a man like you could be dating women twenty years younger. C'mon, Uncle Leo, I've seen the way women look at you. When's the last time you looked in a mirror? You're an Adonis! You've got beautiful features, lovely…

Adonis Males Players Playing The Field Joseph Goebbels

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