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Steven Wright

43 quotesTelevision Actor · Born Dec 6, 1955 · United States Of America · Male

Steven Alexander Wright (born December 6, 1955) is an American stand-up comedian, actor, writer, and an Oscar-winning film producer. He is known for his distinctly lethargic voice and slow, deadpan delivery of ironic, philosophical, and sometimes nonsense jokes, paraprosdokians, non sequiturs, anti-humor, and one-liners with contrived situations. Wright was ranked as the twenty-third greatest comedian by Comedy Central in a list of the 100 greatest stand-up comics. He was awarded the Academy Award for Best Live Action Short Film for his 1988 short film The Appointments of Dennis Jennings. 2Early life and career Wright was born at Mount Auburn Hospital in Cambridge, Massachusetts, and grew up in Burlington, Massachusetts, one of four children of Lucille "Dolly" (née Lomano) and Alexander K. Wright. He was raised as a Roman Catholic. His mother was Italian American and his father was of Scottish descent. Wright's father worked as an electronics technician who "tested a lot of stuff" for NASA (in the Apollo spacecraft program), and when that program ended he worked as a truck driver. Wright attended Middlesex Community College in Bedford, Massachusetts for two years to earn his associate's degree before continuing his baccalaureate education at Emerson College. He graduated from Emerson in 1978 and the next year he began performing stand-up comedy in 1979 at the Comedy Connection in Bosto

All Absurd (13)Surreal (9)Standup Comedy (6)Writing (4)Standup Comics (3)Zen (2)Jokes (2)Making Shit Up (2)Rules (2)Baby Monitors (2)bizarre (2)Subconscious (2)Cab (1)Lint (1)Tech Overload (1)

From “The Beer Devotional: A Daily Celebration of the World's Most Inspiring Beers”

24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence?

Drinking coincidence Beer

From “Steven Wright, master of meh”

I’m so fortunate, because I just love making shit up.

comedy Writing Making Shit Up

The idea comes, then the wording comes within 25 seconds. And then it’s done. And if I say it and it doesn’t work, I don’t change it, I get rid of it.

Writing Jokes Creative Process

You never know what you have until it’s gone, and I wanted to know what I had, so I got rid of everything.

One-Liners Zen Absurd Surreal Deadpan

I just started at an open mic night in the 1970s and I’m still going, still doing now what I started to do then. I know other people might look up to me. But really, I’m just me after a bit of time has gone by.

Open Mic Standup Comedy Standup Comics 1970s

In Babe: Pig in the City, my voice came out of a real chimpanzee. It’s weird to go to the movies and see a 15-foot chimpanzee’s head with your voice coming out of it. It’s fun.

Babe: Pig in the City Chimpanzee Voiceover Fun

From “Q&A”

If Salvador Dali was hired to design a city, that’s what Las Vegas looks like to me.

Salvador Dali Dada Surrealism Las Vegas bizarre

It’s like, I love making shit up and I love performing.…The mind is interesting to me. The mind is fun. I have fun hanging out with myself. I’m my own friend, and we have serious things, of course, but we also…I’ll think of things and laugh out loud by myself.

Performing Standup Comedy Making Shit Up The Mind LOL

From “Steven Wright”

The dreams of my life were to go on The Tonight Show and to have a small part in a movie. When I was 28, I had been on The Tonight Show a bunch of times, and Risa Bramon, who was casting Desperately Seeking Susan—I didn't know her, but she liked my stand-up—brought me to the attention of the…

the tonight show Johnny Carson Desperately Seeking Susan Risa Bramon Standup Comedy

I'm a conservative kind of guy, so I do have these rules—I won't talk about this, this, and this. And I don't like talking about topical things. I like talking about little things, like lint.

Conservative Rules Topical Lint

You're on a jet, you're five miles in the air, you're going 500 miles an hour, and you ask someone to bring you another Coke. That is as weird to me as any joke I said last night. I think that's why people identify with me, because there are a billion pieces of information, and there's so much…

Standup Comedy Chaos civilization Coke Shit

I tell people I'm just a secretary for my own mind: Something comes into my head, and I write it down.

Writing Secretary

Very rarely do I talk off the top of my head on stage. I'm not an improv guy. I'm a writer-guy who presents what he's written. I don't even really write the jokes, they just come into my head, and a joke can't come into my head on stage, because I'm too busy.

Standup Comedy Improv Jokes writer

Over the years, I've learned that the best way to react [to hecklers] is to ignore them. I don't need to be in a two-man band with a stranger when I'm doing what I do.

Hecklers Standup Comedy

It was like getting in a cab by accident with Jesus.

Cab accident jesus

My dream was so strong that I made myself do what horrified me. I was a nervous wreck.

Dreams Nervous Wreck

About five years ago, somebody showed me some web sites that had my material all over them, and I thought that was fascinating. One reason was, I'd never seen my jokes written one right after another like that. I write on drawing paper—I don't even like lines on the paper—so I have notebooks all…

Plagiarism Wrongly Attributed Writing Notebooks

When I die, I'm going to leave my body to science fiction.

Living Will Science Fiction

I'm staying in an old hotel. They sent me a wake-up letter.

Luddite Old Fashioned Wake Up Call

I was born. When I was 23 I started telling jokes. Then I started going on television and doing films. That's still what I am doing. The end.

Strandup Comedy Standup Comics The End

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