“She’s the worst. I hate how she ‘huchs’ her words.”— Kelly Galuska, Jessi, Jessi Klein, imdb.comTagged: worst, Huchs, Words
“Andrew: What, like a show about a bunch of kids masturbating? Nick: Isn't that technically child pornography? Maurice: Holy shit, I hope not! I mean, maybe if it's animated, we could get away with it. Right?”— Gil Ozeri, Maurice "Maury" Hormone Monster, Nick Kroll, imdb.comTagged: kids, masturbating, animated
“Nick: Are we really doing the Electric Slide right now? Andrew: I guess. It is a bat mitzvah.”— Kelly Galuska, Andrew, John Mulaney, imdb.comTagged: electric slide, guess, dance, Bat mitzvah
“Look, I know this all seems embarrassing right now but maybe one day, you'll look back on this time fondly and perhaps even make something beautiful out of it.”— Gil Ozeri, Maurice "Maury" Hormone Monster, Nick Kroll, imdb.comTagged: embarrassing, fondly, Beautiful
“Miss G: Okay, Steve, you're going to have to learn your letters. Coach Steve: Well, obviously, I know the big song. Teepee, fat guy, sideways moon, other fat guy, sideways comb! Miss G: Wow. That is a song.”— Duffy Boudreau, Coach Steve, Nick Kroll, imdb.comTagged: Letters, learn, big song, Wrong
“Jessi: Those girls are gonna eat him alive...and then barf him back out because they're bulimic. Matthew: You're fucking funny. She's funny! We're friends now.”— Andrew Goldberg, Nick Kroll, Jessi, Jessi Klein, imdb.comTagged: Girls, eat him alive, Barf, Bulimic, Funny
“Andrew Glouberman: I'm coming, I'm coming. Hormone Monster: Not yet, that's why we gotta get to the bathroom, Sweetheart!”— Andrew Goldberg, Nick Kroll, Maurice "Maury" Hormone Monster, Nick Kroll, imdb.comTagged: coming, Sweetheart, bathroom
“Hey man I got a medical emergency so I gotta bounce. Jack off twice and page me in the morning.”— Jennifer Flackett, Andrew Goldberg, Maurice "Maury" Hormone Monster, Nick Kroll, imdb.comTagged: Cartoon Shows, Cartoon Network
“Maurice: I know I'm a broken record with this but mercury is in retrograde. Andrew: Enough with the astrology. Maurice: Spoken like a two-faced fuckin' Gemini.”— Jennifer Flackett, Andrew Goldberg, Maurice "Maury" Hormone Monster, Nick Kroll, imdb.comTagged: Cartoon Shows, Cartoon Network
“You're slut shaming me. Shame. On. You.”— Jennifer Flackett, Andrew Goldberg, Nick Kroll, Daniel, Zach Woods, imdb.comTagged: Cartoon Shows, Cartoon Network
“This is a witch hunt just like the crucible, all I wanted was a blowjob at a high school party, is that such a crime?”— Jennifer Flackett, Andrew Goldberg, Nick Kroll, Daniel, Zach Woods, imdb.comTagged: Cartoon Shows, Cartoon Network
“The mons pubis? Oh its the welcome mat to the pleasure palace.”— Jennifer Flackett, Andrew Goldberg, Jessi, Jessi Klein, imdb.comTagged: Cartoon Shows, Cartoon Network
“Jay: How else are men supposed to get blowjobs? Maurice: You lean your head back, arch your crotch in the air and say, 'Dinner is served.'”— Jennifer Flackett, Andrew Goldberg, Maurice "Maury" Hormone Monster, Nick Kroll, imdb.comTagged: Cartoon Shows, Cartoon Network
“I wish women were more sex-positive but we're just not there yet.”— Jennifer Flackett, Andrew Goldberg, Nick Kroll, Daniel, Zach Woods, imdb.comTagged: Cartoon Shows, Cartoon Network
“Andrew: What's a head push? Jessi: Its when a man pushes a woman's head to try to get a blowjob. Nick: Wait that's a move!?”— Jennifer Flackett, Andrew Goldberg, Nick Kroll, Andrew, John Mulaney, imdb.comTagged: Cartoon Shows, Cartoon Network