“Bitches be telling the dude to go deeper while having sex. Now if he could, he would. You don't hear him yelling tighter, tighter.”— Horny Facts™, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, orders, Deeper, Tighter
“*Havin sex w/ buzzfeed employee* Me: I'm gonna cum. Buzzfeed employee: Here are 16 other things that will make you cum, you won't believe #9.”— Brandon, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, Buzzfeed, Clickbait
“He had that "I gotta sneeze" face the whole time we were having sex!”— Little Thickburger, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, sneezing, Funny
“I can't have sex with a pregnant bitch the baby gonna grab my dick or something.”— killthots, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, pregnant, babies
“I felt no earth shaking during the Oklahoma earthquake tonight. Ummmm, not much different then my sex life.”— BettyFNCrocker, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, Earthquake, sex life
“Moooanday, tongueday, wetday, thirstday, freakday, sexday, suckday.”— Sex Freaks , twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, weekdays, moaning, thirsty
“Good sex is when you can remember every position 5 months later.”— ebony cousin, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, sex positions, Memories
“If sex for girls feels anything like cleaning your ears with a Q-tip then I can;t blame females for being hoes”— Louisiana ⚜Boy, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, Q-Tips, Ears, cleaning
“Age is just a number you write into a box when you register as a sex offender.”— MR HAND, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, Sex Offender, Age, Consent
“Birth Control Pills should be for men. It makes much more sense to unload a gun than to shoot at a bulletproof vest.”— Sex Freaks , twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, birth control, Men, Women
“If Hillary Clinton wins tomorrow it will be the first time in American history that two presidents have had sex with each other.”— lasagna, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, Election, Hillary Clinton, Bill Clinton
“It's so easy to get over someone if their sex game is average.”— Baby, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, Bad Sex, Exes, Moving On
“[phone sex] You: What are you wearing Me: A face mask”— audrey honeydrone, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, phone sex, dirty talk
“Don't wake me up for sex and then expect me to put in work, you woke me up.”— Katya, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, Sleeping, Effort, Hard Work
“[Gets into argument with girlfriend after sex.] Give me back my sperm.”— Cat Damon, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, Sperm, arguments
“Cosmo sex tip: instead of 'YES' and 'DON'T STOP,' mix things up by moaning 'AFFIRMATIVE' and 'CONTINUE.'”— emerald, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, Cosmo, moaning
“My German girlfriend likes to rate our sex between 1-10Last night we tried anal, she kept shouting 9!!!That's the best I've done so far!”— Shit Jokes, twitter.comTagged: Sex Tweets, anal, Anal Sex, Jokes