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Quotes tagged ‘Divorce’

(126 total)

Never have I ever, um, dealt with how my parents' divorce affected my overall, you know, being in relationships.

— Tami Sagher, Abbi Abrams, Abbi Jacobson, imdb.com

There’s no such thing as a blameless party in a divorce.

— Peter Morgan, Philip Mountbatten, Duke of Edinburgh, Matt Smith, imdb.com

Mary Hartman: As far as I'm concerned, you can have Tom if you want him. Mae Olinski: [gasps] Do you really mean that? Mary Hartman: Yes, I do. You see, I don't want him anymore, and there's no sense in letting him go to waste.

— Jerry Adelman, Mary Hartman, Louise Lasser, imdb.com

Ben Seaver: [after Carol reads Jason's old book, in delight] So I got a divorce for my family history! Carol Seaver: I guess... Ben Seaver: [runs upstairs] Oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy! [a shot of the Seaver house on a winter's day is shown…

— Kate Boutilier, Ben Seaver, Jeremy Miller, imdb.com

You pulled that heartstrings con job on me?! You piece of shit! 'Oh, my brain used to work, I'm sick, I don't know what to do!' Asshole! No wonder Rebecca left you! What took her so long?!

— Peter Gould, Thomas Schnauz, Jimmy McGill, Bob Odenkirk, imdb.com

And now, would you like another cup of divorce?

— Richard Sale, Phyllis Stephens, Mabel Albertson, imdb.com

Hey, Rhoda, do you know what I'm doing? I am changing my clothes at eight o'clock at night so that I can go to a club where I'm going to lie about being divorced so that I can perhaps in a few months' time end up in Paris speaking Spanish.

— Treva Silverman, Mary Richards, Mary Tyler Moore, imdb.com

Oscar: Wait, is this all part of your master plan? Gabby: What do you mean? Oscar: We get back together, you divorce me, and you get half of the half I have left?

— Neil Simon, Matthew Perry, Oscar Madison, Matthew Perry, imdb.com

I happen to believe in the sanctity of marriage no matter how ugly or disgusting it gets. I'd kill her before I'd divorce her!

— Alan Alda, Major Franklin Marion Burns, Larry Linville, imdb.com

Marriage is probably the chief cause of divorce.

— Larry Gelbart, Major Franklin Marion Burns, Larry Linville, imdb.com

Ruth: I want to know why your other wives left you! George: Because they asked too many fucking questions!

— Kate Robin, Ruth Fisher, Frances Conroy, imdb.com

You know what I was thinking about? If Mary Tyler Moore married and then divorced Steven Tyler, then married and divorced Michael Moore, then got into a three-way lesbian marriage with Demi Moore and Mandy Moore, would she go by the name Mary Tyler Moore Tyler Moore Moore Moore? Hm.

— David Caspe, Max Blum, Adam Pally, imdb.com

Relationships don't work the way they do on television and in the movies. Will they? Won't they? And then they finally do, and they're happy forever. Gimme a break. Nine out of ten of them end because they weren't right for each other to begin with, and half of the ones who get married get divorced…

— Gabrielle Allan, Perry Cox, John C. McGinley, imdb.com

I’m pro marriage. Nearly 40 years of ups and downs to back that up. But when we as a church culture demonize divorce as the worst possible outcome - the sin of all sins - we truly have no clue on this ever loving earth what some people are enduring. We do not submit to abuse. NO.

— Beth Moore, twitter.com

Divorce sucks.

— Chris Pratt, elle.com

Divorce is always hard. Especially on the kids. ‘Course I am the result of my parents having stayed together, so ya never know.

— Larry David, Jerry Seinfeld, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Joey: Suppose we're a divorced couple. Chandler: Okay. Joey: And I got custody of the kid, right? Now, suppose the kid dies and I gotta buy a new kid.

— Perry Rein, Gigi McCreery, Joey Tribbiani, Matt LeBlanc, imdb.com

There is no such thing as an ex-wife. If you had a relationship, just because you don't live with them anymore doesn't mean that they're a non-human being, and if they want to say hello, then there should be a hello.

— Willie Nelson, esquire.com

You know why divorces are so expensive? Because they’re worth it!

— Wille Nelson, willienelson.com

I’m not sure I have many valuable lessons to take into my next relationship, but I am confident I can handle making breakfast.

— Brandy Jensen, myrecipes.com

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