Quotes tagged ‘breasts’

“I feel like I'm the one with tits in the equation.”

— Amy Schumer, Amy Townsend, Amy Schumer, imdb.com

“Raditch: Do I want to know what these are? J.T.: Those are the silicon molecules of the female breast. I made it out of flour, water, and lard!”

— Linda Schuyler, Van Moore, J.T. Yorke, Ryan Cooley, imdb.com

“[voiceover] My dad and I used to be pretty tight. The sad truth is, my breasts have come between us.”

— Winnie Holzman, Angela Chase, Claire Danes, imdb.com

“What's in the bag, Corrine? Chicken wings? Booby tassels?”

— Tim Herlihy, Steve Franks, Sonny Koufax, Adam Sandler, imdb.com

“Doc Cochran: Jane, for me, the female breast long ago lost mystery or allure. Open your goddamn blouse. Calamity Jane: I'll keep my fucking eyes shut, but I'll know every fucking move you make.”

— Jody Worth, Calamity Jane, Robin Weigert, imdb.com

“Mary: He called me ma'am. Marshall: Yeah, but he was looking down your shirt when he said it. Mary: Why are you being so nice to me?”

— David Maples, Matt Ward, Mary Shannon, Mary McCormack, imdb.com

“I was talking with a friend recently about how I sometimes wish that I had a flatter chest so I could look more androgynous, and they cut me off mid-sentence and were like: breasts aren’t inherently gendered.”

— Rhiannon Collett, vice.com

“While we were getting beat up, I think I got to second base.”

— Philip Stark, Fez, Wilmer Valderrama, imdb.com

“I may not say this right because I am new to English, but she has tremendous breasts, yes?”

— Bonnie Turner, Terry Turner, Mark Brazill, Fez, Wilmer Valderrama, imdb.com

“When I was pageantizing, my mother told me there's only three things standing between you and winning: your breasts, and wanting it bad enough”

— Jack Burditt, Jenna Maroney, Jane Krakowski, imdb.com

“You can lead a man to breast water, but you can’t make him actually think your tits are big once the bra is off.”

— Tracy Moore, melmagazine.com

“Kyle: Stan, you can use family love as a weapon against Shelley. The next time she's going to kick your ass, just tell her 'Shelley, you're my sister and I love you.' Kenny [muffled]: And I want to see you handling your breasts. Stan: Sick, dude, she's my sister!”

— Dan Sterling, Trey Parker, Kyle Broflovski, Matt Stone, imdb.com

“Francine, my mother is not manipulating me. Our relationship is completely normal. And if you keep upsetting me, then I'll have to retreat to my safe place between her breasts.”

— Nahnatchka Khan, Stan Smith (voice), Seth MacFarlane, imdb.com

“I may be blonde with great cans, but I'm pretty smart when I've had my eight hours.”

— Seth MacFarlane, Steve Hely, Nahnatchka Khan, Francine Smith (voice), Wendy Schaal, imdb.com

“Jason, when you're filling out a female patient's exam report, her breasts can be "healthy" or "unhealthy," but never "bangin' double-Ds."”

— Bill Lawrence, John 'J.D.' Dorian, Zach Braff, imdb.com

“I think people are fascinated with breasts that bounce. They are so used to seeing [fake ones]. People are confused [that mine bounce]! My breasts have a life of their own.”

— Jennifer Lawrence, huffingtonpost.com

“How are Kentucky Fried Chicken and a woman the same? Once you take away the legs and the breasts, you’re left with one greasy box to put your bone in.”

— Unknown, thoughtcatalog.com

“A leg man? Why would I be a leg man? I don't need legs. I have legs.”

— Peter Mehlman, Jerry Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld, imdb.com

“You know, men can sit through the most boring movie if there's even the slightest possibility that a woman will take her top off.”

— Bill Masters, John Hayman, Steve Skrovan, Elaine Benes, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, imdb.com

“You never forget where you were when you learned the swimsuit models are wearing bras they airbrush out of the pictures. They DON'T have magic boobs that don't sag or look squished flat. They're wearing bras. Your breasts are great! It is the SWIMSUIT that makes them look weird. If you could wear an…”

— Nicole Cliffe, twitter.com