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Eric Cartman

70 quotesPupil · Born Jul 1, 2000 · United States Of America · Male

Eric Theodore Cartman (often referred to as just Cartman) is a main character in the animated television series South Park, created by Matt Stone and Trey Parker, and voiced by Parker. Cartman is one of four central characters in South Park, along with Stan Marsh, Kyle Broflovski, and Kenny McCormick. Cartman first appeared, originally named Kenny, in prototypical form in a 1992 animated short Jesus vs. Frosty, and a 1995 animated short Jesus vs. Santa, and first appeared on television in the pilot episode of South Park, "Cartman Gets an Anal Probe", on August 13, 1997. Cartman is an elementary school student who lives with his mother in the fictional town of South Park, Colorado, where he routinely has extraordinary experiences atypical of a small town. Cartman has been portrayed as aggressive, prejudiced, arrogant and narcissistic since his character's inception; Stone and Parker describe the character as "a little Archie Bunker". These traits are significantly augmented in later seasons as his character evolves and he begins to exhibit extremely psychopathic, sociopathic and manipulative behavior and also be depicted as highly intelligent, able to execute morally appalling plans and business ideas with success. Cartman is considered to be the most popular character on South Park. Parker and Stone state that he is their favorite character, and the one with whom they most identif

All insults (3)Dolphins (3)fat (3)Hippie (3)Smoking Crack (2)Native Americans (2)Hitler (2)Circumcision (2)big-boned (2)Immature (2)Threats (2)beefcake (2)Hippies (2)balls (2)Black People (2)

From “Cartman Gets an Anal Probe”

Kyle: [speaking to aliens] V-Visitors? This morning you took my brother, Ike. [sad, dramatic music begins playing] He's a little freckled kid that looks like a football. At first, I was happy you took him away, but I've learned something today: That having a little brother is a pretty special thing.…

family members Aliens Loss Fuck fuckers

Okay, that does it! Now listen! Why is it that everything today has involved things either going in or coming out of my ass?! I'm sick of it! It's completely immature! [Cartman simultaneously farts fire and a satellite dish comes out of his bottom]

ass jokes Immature

[after seeing a crop circle on the news that looks just like him] Cartman: Hey, that kind of looks like...Tom Selleck.

Tom Selleck Crop Circle

Chef: [gets out of his car] Hello there, children! Boys: Hey, Chef! Stan: What's going to be for lunch today, Chef? Chef: Well, today, it's Salisbury steak with buttered noodles, and a choice of green-bean casserole or vegetable medley. Cartman: Kick ass.

Chef Salisbury Steak Kick Ass

Okay, that does it! Now listen! Why is it that everything today has involved things either going in or coming out of my ass?! I'm sick of it! It's completely immature!

Anal Humor Fart Jokes Sick Immature

From “Weight Gain 4000”

Stan: Dude, Dolphins are intelligent and friendly. Cartman: Intelligent and friendly on rye bread with some mayonnaise!

Dolphins Carnivore

Kyle: Whoa, Cartman. Talk about wide load. Cartman: Yeah, I'm really starting to fill out nicely. Kyle: You're not filling out nicely, you're fatter than ever! Cartman: I'm not fat! I'm getting in shape! Kyle: Cartman, you're such a fat boy, that when you walk down the street, people go 'God damn…

Weight Gain fat ass fat

Cartman: If dolphins are so smart, why do they live in igloos? Stan: Dolphins don't live in igloos! That's Eskimos! Cartman: Dolphins, Eskimos, who cares? It's all a bunch of tree-hugging hippie crap.

Dolphins Eskimos igloos

Tough Guy: Get some today, and say with me—Beefcake! Cartman: Beefcake. Tough Guy: BEEFCAKE!! Cartman: Beefcake! Tough Guy/Cartman: BEEEFFCAAAAAKE!!! Announcer: May cause irreversible damage to the kidneys and liver.

beefcake liver damage kidney damage male supplements

If dolphins are so smart, why do they get caught in those fishing nets all the time?

Dolphins Smart fishing nets

Follow your dreams, you can reach your goals, I'm living proof. Beefcake! Beefcake!

Goals Dreams beefcake

From “Volcano”

Stan: I don't want to shoot the bunny. Jimbo: No nephew of mine is going to be a tree-hugger! Cartman: Yeah, hippie! Go back to Woodstock if you don't want to shoot anything!

woodstock Hippie tree-hugger

Stan: My uncle Jimbo says that after this he's gonna take me hunting in Africa. Kyle: Wow. That'd be cool. Cartman: My mom says there's a lot of black people in Africa.

Africa Hunting Black People Stating the Obvious

Jimbo: Okay, each of you young'uns take a gun, a beer, and some smokes. Cartman: Hey! I didn't get a gun! [Jimbo gives a rifle to Cartman] Sweet. This is like the gun I used in 'Nam. Stan: You weren't in Vietnam, Cartman! Ned: Were you stationed in DA Nang? Stan: Cartman always makes stuff up, Ned,…

Guns Beer Cigarettes Vietnam Threats

From “An Elephant Makes Love to a Pig”

Cartman: If a woman did that to me, I'd be all like, 'Hey, why don't you stop...dressing me up like a mailman and making me dance for you, while you go and smoke crack in your bedroom and have sex with some guy I don't even know on my dad's bed?' Stan: Cartman, what the heck are you talking about?…

Smoking Crack bedroom wuss role playing

From “Death”

Cartman: I would never kill somebody. Unless they pissed me off. Grampa: Oh, is that a fact? Well, let me tell ya something, Porky. Your mom was over here earlier, and I humped her like a little bitch! Cartman [shocked]: What? Grampa: That's right! Stan: Grampa! Grampa: And then, I dug up your…

Necrophilia i fucked your mom piece of crap

Mrs. Cartman: Eric, I just got a call from your friend Kyle's mother. She said that this show is naughty and might make you a potty-mouth. Cartman: That's a bunch of crap. Kyle's mom is a dirty Jew!

naughty Potty Mouth Jew Anti-Semitism

From “Pinkeye”

Cartman: Go back to Endor, you stupid Wookie! Kyle: Wookies don't live on Endor.

endor wookies

You gotta respect my authora-tah!

Authority Hitler

Cartman: Too bad drinking Scotch isn't a paying job, or else Kenny's dad would be a millionaire. Kenny: [oblivious to Cartman's statement] Cartman: I said your dad would be a millionaire, get it?!?! Kenny: [oblivious] Cartman: exasperated Kenny! Your family's poor, Kenny! Your family's poor! I don't…

Alcohol Scotch Millionaire insults poor

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