“You might think that all of the boys in school would want to tap this, but my MySpace schedule keeps me way too busy to date.”Tagged: MySpace, Dating
“I am not homophobic. In fact, I have two gay dads. See, I was born out of love. My two dads screened potential surrogates based on beauty and IQ. Then they mixed their sperm together and used a turkey baster. To this day we don't know which one is my real dad, which I think is pretty amazing.”Tagged: Homophobia, beauty, IQ, Artificial Insemination
“Sue Sylvester: High school is a caste system. Kids fall into certain slots. Your jocks and your popular kids up in the penthouse. The invisibles and the kids playing live-action out in the forest: bottom floor. Will Schuester: And...where do the Glee kids lie? Sue Sylvester: Sub-basement.”Tagged: Glee, high school, Caste System
“Puck: What the hell, dude? I can't believe you're helping out this loser! Finn Hudson: Don't you get it, man? We're all losers! Everyone in this school! Hell, everyone in this town! Out of all the kids who graduate, maybe half will go to college, and two will leave the state to do it! I'm not afraid…”Tagged: Loser, Acceptance, high school
“Finn Hudson: Look, I owe you guys an apology. I never should have quit. I don't want to be the guy that just drives around throwing eggs at people! Rachel Berry: That was you? Kurt Hummel: You and your friends threw pee balloons at me. Finn Hudson: I know. Kurt Hummel: You nailed all my lawn…”Tagged: Pranks, Apologies
“Nowadays being anonymous is worse than being poor. Fame is the most important thing in our culture now. And if there is one thing I’ve learned it is that no one is just going to hand it to you.”Tagged: anonymous, poor, Social Media
“We are up in the polls because we're walking the walk.”Tagged: Polls, Walk, Walking the Walk, Talking the Talk
“My father always said you'd become a man when you bought your first house. I'm not sure what he meant, though, because he burned ours down during a drunken fight with mom.”Tagged: homeownership, Arson
“Have you ever liked someone so much you just wanna lock yourself in your room, turn on sad music and cry?”Tagged: crushes, Sad, cry, Sad music
“People think you're gay now, Finn. And do you know what that makes me? Your big, gay beard!”Tagged: gay, beard
“You're the most talented person I know. Even more than that guy at the mall who can juggle chainsaws.”Tagged: Talent, Juggling
“If you can master this, you can sneak anything out of a store between your knees. Shoes, prom dresses. I once got a cake out of a kid's birthday party with the candle still lit.”Tagged: Shoplifting
“I'm gonna say this as nice as I possibly can, but you look like a sad clown hooker.”Tagged: Hooker, sad clown
“Will Schuester: Let's bury the hatchet, Sue. Sue Sylvester: No. I won't be burying any hatchet. Unless I get a clear shot to your groin!”Tagged: Bury The Hatchet, Revenge, Reconciliation, Anti-Male Violence
“Bringing down this club may be easier than I thought. I am engorged with venom and triumph.”Tagged: Revenge, venom, Triumph
“You know what, I used to love coming here. But now this just reminds me of everything that I’ve lost.”Tagged: Loss, Regret