Show

Beavis and Butt-head

Beavis and Butt-head are high school students whose lifestyles revolve around TV, junk food (usually nachos), shopping malls, heavy metal music, and trying to "score with chicks". Each show contains short cartoons centering on the duo who live in the fict

(87 total)

Seasons

Season 1 (2)Season 2 (30)Season 3 (13)Season 4 (19)Season 5 (11)Season 6 (3)Season 7 (7)Season 8 (4)

Characters

Mike Judge (129)Butt-head (54)Kristofor Brown (31)Glenn Eichler (28)Beavis (21)Beavis & Butthead (5)Bo Weinberg (3)Dave Krinsky (3)David X. Cohen (3)Joe Stillman (3)

“Butt-head: Welcome to the future. Here is your free porn. Beavis: Yeah. Porn is good for you. Did you know that?”

— Kristofor Brown, Beavis, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: Future, Porn

“Principal McVicker: You two are the worst students in this school has ever had. And now because of that No Child Left Behind law, we may lose our funding! Teachers will get laid off, I could lose my job! Butt-Head: Uh…did you say something about a child's behind? Beavis: Yeah, he definitely said som…”

— Dave Krinsky, Butt-head, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: no child left behind, Child Molestation

“Bartender: Look, I told you kids! You have no I.D.'s, you look underage, and if I serve you, I'll go to jail! Butt-head: Uhh…how about one for the road?”

— Etan Cohen, Butt-head, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: underage drinking, not taking "No" for an answer, One for the Road

“The end of the world kicks ass.”

— Dave Krinsky, Beavis, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: End of the World, Kick Ass

“Uh, did anyone ever tell you sound boring on the phone? Can you like, shut up, and tell me how to get this computer to show porn?”

— Glenn Lucas, Butt-head, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: tech support, Boring, Porn

“Uhh, thank you oh great master for your wisdom. But, uh, we were like wondering if you could like, bite us?”

— John Altschuler, Dave Krinsky, Butt-head, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: Wisdom, bite us

“Butt-head: Face it, Beavis, you have a problem with your penis. Maybe you should wash it or something. Beavis: Yeah, I'll just…wait, with water? No way, then it'll get all wet.”

— Joe Stillman, Beavis, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: Genital Hygiene, penis

“Beavis, I have seen the top of the mountain, and it is good.”

— Joe Stillman, Butt-head, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: I have been to the mountaintop, it is good

“T.V. voiceover: You're watching PBS. Butt-head: He said 'B.S.' Beavis: But first he said 'pee.'”

— Kristofor Brown, Butt-head, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: Juvenile Humor, PBS

“Buzzcut: And what about your patent disregard for Beavis! Do you not care a rat's ass for the safety of your closest companion!? Butt-head: Uhh…no.”

— Kristofor Brown, Mike Judge, Butt-head, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: Compassion

“Uh…I've got a crisis…in my pants.”

— Kristofor Brown, Butt-head, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: Crisis, erection

“Gus Baker: Hey! We're on the air! You can't use that language! Beavis: We use language?”

— Kristofor Brown, Beavis, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: Language, Profanity

“I don't know what your problem is, but I simply cannot have students roaming the hallways during class, interrupting other classes, and giving prophecies of a great plague.”

— Kristofor Brown, Mike Judge, Principal McVicker, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: Juvenile Delinquency, Prophecies

“Judge: You'll need someone who knows the laws, who's familiar with the penal system and— Beavis: [laughing with Butt-head] She said penal.”

— David X. Cohen, Glenn Eichler, Beavis, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: Penal, Penile, Homonyms

“Beavis: So, like, in heaven, will all the chicks do anything I want? St. Peter: No. Beavis: That sucks. Do I get X-ray vision? Can I get some nachos? St. Peter: No. Beavis: Are you sure this is heaven?”

— Larry Doyle, Kristofor Brown, Beavis, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: Heaven, St. Peter, Chicks, Nachos, X-Ray Vision

“Butt-head: Hey, Beavis. We could get rich doing this. We need to get more balls. Beavis: [laughs] You've got to hear what you just said, Butt-head. You said, heh, "We need to get more balls." Butt-head: Huh huh huh, oh yeah.”

— Kristofor Brown, Beavis, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: balls, Double Entendre

“We're never gonna score! We’ll get cars and like, we'll get jobs, and we'll have to like, mow lawns and scrub the grill, but we're never gonna score ever! It's gonna suck!”

— Kristofor Brown, Mike Judge, Beavis, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: Getting Laid, scoring

“Butt-head: I didn't know you were psychic, Beavis. Beavis: Yeah, remember what those doctors said on those tests? Butt-head: No, Beavis, they said you were psycho.”

— Kristofor Brown, Mike Judge, Butt-head, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: Psychic, psycho, Homonyms

“Mr. O'Brien: Alright, now I'm gonna ask you some questions. Failure to be truthful, and your responses will be interpreted as an acknowledgment of guilt. Do you understand? Butt-head: Uh…yeah. [detector buzzes 'false'] Uh huh huh. Uh, I mean, no. [detector dings 'true'] Huh huh huh.”

— Peter Gaffney, Mike Judge, Butt-head, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: polygraph, Truthful, Guilt

“Kindergarden teacher: Butt-head, are you angry? Butt-head: I'm, like, angry at numbers. Beavis: There's, like, too many of 'em and stuff.”

— Kristofor Brown, Mike Judge, Beavis, Mike Judge, imdb.com

Tagged: Innumerate, Anger